10 Hilarious 'Candy Heart Reject' Tweets Will Make You LOL

Say What!? 0

candy heartsNow, typically, candy hearts don't get people excited in the slightest: They're cheap and chalky tasting with really lame slogans imprinted on top. But "candy heart rejects" are a whole different story.

If Valentine's Day has got you down in the dumps with all the cheesy proclamations of love, then you definitely are going to want to check out #candyheartrejects on Twitter. By the time you scroll through all the incestuous, misogynistic, and dirty sayings, you won't even remember that you weren't on the receiving end of all those flowers and candy boxes today. In fact, you'll probably need a shower, and we mean that in the most clean way possible.

Imagine if you were to get a candy heart with one of the following sayings on it ... Best Valentine's Day ever! We rounded up some of the funniest. What are you waiting for -- take a look!

Warning: The following tweets acknowledge the existence of sex and the fact that it happens between two (and sometimes more) people.

@AnthonyDeVito: BE OURS #candyheartrejects

@thejohnblog: WHENS DINNR? #candyheartrejects

@garethaveyard: Be My Alibi #candyheartrejects

@theheathhead: You make me itch! #candyheartrejects

@stevecarell: That's what she said. #candyheartrejects

@colleenmarie27: Lots o'Baggage. #candyheartrejects

@cmoonster: Hide yo kids, hide yo wife #candyheartejects

@danhopp: Who is Paul McHeartney? #candyheartrejects

@evil_dumbledore: Roses are red, violets are blue, does this cloth smell, like chloroform to you? #candyheartrejects 

@bettyfckinwhite: I forgot our safe word. #candyheartrejects

Suddenly Valentine's Day doesn't seem so tame and cheesy ... Do you have any good "candy heart rejects" to share? 

 

Image via Lara604/Flickr

twitter

Add a Comment

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

F