I love my BlackBerry. He really gets me. He's the first thing I look at when I wake up, and the last thing I look at before bed. When I'm down, he's there to cheer me up with a link to a comedian's Twitter feed. When I'm happy, he's there to help me share a good story or a photo. During the lonely hours in which he isn't by my side, I feel phantom vibrations in my pocket, in my bag, in my heart, and I know that my darling BlackBerry, while temporarily out of reach, is not gone forever. He is my all.
And there are no fewer than 10 reasons why a smartphone is better than a husband or a boyfriend.
- Smartphones never have to ask for directions, they give the directions.
- They're always up for Scrabble.
- They remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries.
- They know just how you like it to vibrate, and when and where and for how long.
- If they break, it's totally acceptable to trade one in for a newer version.
- They don't mind when your mother calls.
- Smartphones really like it when you check in, and sometimes will give you a badge for it.
- You can talk to them all you want, and they'll never, ever talk back.
- Their forte is planning.
- You can throw them in a lake, river, ocean when you're frustrated and you won't be questioned by the police.
What do you love more about your smartphone than your significant other?
Photo via gabofr/Flickr