Oh for the love of Mike. Ariel Castro, alleged kidnapper and all around sicko (allegedly), is upset, y'all! Set to plead not guilty, he can't believe that American thinks he's a monster. In fact, he wants us all to know that he loves his daughter dearly. Wait. Isn't this the daughter delivered by kidnapping victim Amanda Berry during her nearly 10-year ordeal, locked up in a house in Cleveland, Ohio, with two other women who were also being held against their will?

Yup, that's the one! The way Castro's lawyer, Craig Weintraub, tells it, we should all be ashamed of ourselves for demonizing his client. And fellow attorney Jaye Schlachet went even further!

Moms aren't supposed to hurt their kids. It's not a law so much as a general rule of life. But a South Carolina mom was arrested this week and charged with doing the very worst thing a mother can do: killing her own kids. After Suzanna Simpson allegedly shot her children and husband (who is clinging to life in a hospital), she turned the gun on herself ... but couldn't go through with it.

What kind of mother kills her kids? In Suzanna Simpson's case, it would seem a "model" one.

My eyes, my eyes! You guys. For scientific purposes only, I watched Farrah Abraham's sex video just now, and as soon as I file this post, I'm washing out my eyeballs and maybe having a nice, stiff drink. Did I say stiff?!? NOOOO!

It's going to be a long time before I recover from this spectacle. But I watched it for you, dear readers. We know you're wondering what actually goes down (oh geez) in this show -- but you reeeeeeally don't want to have to actually sit down and watch in order to find out. Never fear! We've got Farrah Superstar Backdoor Teen Mom by the numbers right here. Now about that drink ...

All across the country, women were offered a night out on Mother's Day. More than a few of them probably said, "Not tonight, honey, I'm tired." But for Maryland mom Lisa Rainey, the refusal to go out seems to have prompted a brutal double homicide that claimed the mother of two and her stepdaughter. Luckily her son escaped the shooting, but that's just about the only good news to come out of a bizarre Mother's Day killing that leaves more questions than answers.

What would possess someone to kill their wife for refusing to go out on Mother's Day? And just how far can you go to keep yourself safe when you see someone you love turning violent?

Just a few days ago, Priscilla Rodriguez, mother of 8-year-old Leila Fowler who was stabbed to death in her home on April 27, told CBS that not knowing who murdered her daughter was making things much harder to handle. Now, after a 2000-hour police investigation in Valley Spring, Calif., authorities have arrested a suspect -- Leila's 12-year-old brother was taken into custody on May 11.

I think most of us can probably agree that the vast majority of teachers are amazing, generous, passionate people who have the power to inspire our children to greatness. Every now and then, however, there comes a story about someone who's such a disgrace to the profession, it's downright mind-boggling. I'm sorry to report that this is one of those stories, and it involves a Texas sex ed teacher who's accused of sexually assaulting a 13-year-old.

Marlena Mints, 31, has been charged with one count of aggravated sexual assault of a child and two counts of improper relationship with students -- after allegations surfaced that she'd performed oral sex on one of her students. During recess.

Yesterday, a jury of her peers convicted Jodi Arias of First Degree, premeditated murder after she stabbed her on-again, off-again boyfriend Travis Alexander to death in the shower. The crime was horrific -- she shot him in the head, stabbed him 27 times, and slashed his throat -- and it does possibly mean she could get the death penalty.

If she does, it would be a mistake. Why? Because she wants it.

Soon after her conviction, Arias told Fox 10 that she did not want life in prison and that death would be like freedom. And this is EXACTLY why the death penalty is such a completely ridiculous punishment. For the person who commits the crime, it is freedom. It is a get out of jail free card. In most cases, it is what they prefer. And I don't blame them. I would rather be dead than imprisoned for life as well. This is what Arias said:

More sickening details are emerging in the astonishing case of three women who were held captive in a house of horrors for a decade. Police have confirmed that the house in Cleveland, Ohio where Amanda Berry, Gina DeJesus and Michelle Knight were held was full of chains hanging from the ceiling, tape, ropes, and bondage devices. Reportedly at least one woman was "hung from the wall like a trophy."