Rant

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    When mom Natasha Crutchfield sent her 8-year-old son to school, she thought he'd be safe. He was going to SCHOOL. But then her son came home from his San Antonio, Texas school and told her he'd been duct-taped to a chair for three hours by a teacher who said he was too "rowdy."

    Appropriate discipline? Not on your life. But what's a mom to do?

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    Summer is great and all, but you know what's a real pain in the butt? Having to put sunscreen on our kids every morning. If yours are anything like mine -- they act like having it applied is a mild form of torture. But as much of a hassle as it is to add lubing up our kiddos into our morning routines, and as much as they moan and gripe about it -- we have to do it.

    Actually, forget limiting it to summer -- no matter what time of year it is, if your kid is going to be outside, he needs to wear sunscreen. (Yes, even in winter. And on cloudy days. The sun is a sneaky little sucker.)

    Because it's nothing short of irresponsible to send your child off into the sun's damaging rays if he's not protected. I mean, what kind of mom are you if your kid comes home from school or camp looking like a lobster -- all because you couldn't take the extra five minutes to put sunscreen on him?

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    Orlando Shaw is a self-professed lover of women. So much so that he managed to impregnate at least 14 of them, which produced 22 children. Shaw says, "I was young and ambitious, and I love women." But the problem seems to be that while he's ambitious about getting women pregnant, he's not so ambitious when it comes to getting a job that can support them all. So the state of Tennessee has been picking up the tab. And now the mothers are bringing a lawsuit against Uber Baby Daddy Shaw to get him to cough up child support that amounts to $7,000 a month.

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    We've seen cases before in which restaurants have banned kids, because they don't want to be bothered with their assumedly bad behavior. That's one thing, but in Alexandria, Virginia, The Sushi Bar, is banning kids under 18 for the most unbelievable reason. It's so condescending and ridiculous it should have parents everywhere fuming.

    It's not because they want a quiet atmosphere (and just assume all kids will ruin that) or because they've had some bad experiences with children there (they just opened), but because they say helicopter parents need a break. I'm not kidding.

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    Breastfeeding women need support. Formula marketing is the opposite of support -- it's sabotage. Stay with me formula moms. This isn't an attack. I formula fed and I love my babies. I know you do, too. I also breastfed my twins all the milk that I could produce for a year and a half. This is about our terrible breastfeeding rates, not tearing each other down. This is about our obsession with using breasts to sell products. Our breasts should be respected as makers of food for our babies, not to sell cars or clothes.

    A new documentary called The Milky Way featuring Alanis Morissette, Minnie Driver, and Carrie-Anne Moss addresses this and may just make a lactivist out of you. My friend Lauren who is still breastfeeding her daughter Ella who will be turning 3 saw the clip and felt inspired and empowered. She said, "After watching that, I was like eff it -- I'm going to breastfeed forever!" Check out the preview so you can be inspired, too. Maybe even a little activisty against formula.

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    I never thought I'd be complaining about someone telling me I looked good. Then I started trying to lose weight. More to the point, I actually started admitting to people that I was actively trying to lose weight.

    That's when the compliments suddenly rolled forth. "Oh, you look fine!" "But you're not fat!" "You don't need to lose weight!"

    Folks! It may not be polite to tell someone they're overweight, but can we stop with the faux praise? You're not making things any easier on us!

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    Face paint on fun day & popsicles are so ... educational?Are you dreading the last week of school as much as I am? I'm not talking about the summer break that comes after it, folks. I'm talking about the giant waste of time that is the last week of school itself.

    I remember what the tail end of school was like when I was a kid. It was a whole lot of watching movies, playing kickball, eating popsicles, and trying not to roast inside the '50s era un-air-conditioned rural school building where I spent my formative years. And now that I have a kid, I've learned that nothing. Has. Changed.

    The last week of school? Should be optional.

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    The interwebs are abuzz with the Angelina Jolie dish that in order to attend Brad Pitt's movie premiere (and make Jolie's first public first appearance since revealing her double mastectomy), the actress and mother of six -- gasp! -- missed her aunt's funeral. To this I say: Yes, and?!

    But, the snarkers say, this wasn't just any old dead aunt!

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    In what's being called a breakthrough approach to bullying, a Wisconsin town will now fine the parents of children who bully others. That means if your kid harasses another kid, you could have to cough up the cash.

    According to the Wisconsin State Journal, the Monona City Council enacted the "parent-liability" ordinance last week to try to do something to put an end to bullying. A first violation will earn parents a $114 fine; those that follow carry a fine of $177. It defines bullying as “an intentional course of conduct which is reasonably likely to intimidate, emotionally abuse, slander, threaten, or intimidate another person and which serves no legitimate purpose."

    People are thrilled with the unique approach, and it's great to see a community taking the issue so seriously. In practice, however, it's all kinds of problematic.

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    In a perfect world, no one would ever have sex who wasn't prepared to raise a child. We would only have sex with people we love and ponies and unicorns would live in our backyards pooping rainbows and frolicking freely. Sadly, it's not going to happen any time soon, and because of that, there will be a number of unwanted pregnancies every year.

    But what happens in an unwanted pregnancy? Who gets the final decision as to what happens to the fetus when neither a man nor a woman meant to create it? Until now, it has always been a decision left entirely to the woman. She can abort or she can carry to term, either reaching an agreement with the father to adopt or suing him for child support and using his money to raise the child.

    But what about the man? Does he get any say in the matter? In a word: no. And it's not fair.

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