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    As if women trying to have babies in their mid-30s and beyond weren't already barraged by finger-wagging about risks and tests to the moon, now there's a new study fear-mongering "older moms" that their age may raise their child's risk of autism. Researchers from the Drexel University School of Public Health in Philadelphia and Karolinska Institute in Sweden created a new autism model that predicts older parents are more likely to have a child who develops an autism spectrum disorder than younger parents. Apparently, the model shows that autism risk grows steadily with fathers’ increasing age, but accelerates with mothers’ age after 30.

    Yep, 30! And here we were thinking all the risks that came with "advanced maternal age" weren't in play 'til 35 ...

    Well, as damning as it all sounds, women who fit the study's description shouldn't panic.

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    Kim Kardashian loves her some Kim Kardashian. Truly, she does. We know this given the vast and boundless array of selfies that Kim has contributed to the planet. We know this from the fact that she stars in a reality show ... about herself. And we just know this. BUT. Just in case we needed any further proof ... here's Kim buying up a bunch of copies of herself on Vogue!

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    It isn't uncommon to hear about teens getting in trouble for what they're wearing. And it's not exactly a massive surprise, being that some teens dress way too revealing these days (old person speaking here). But in an interesting and ridiculous twist, a teenage girl was kicked out of her prom ... for wearing pants. That's right, a totally innocuous, completely normal pair of pants.

    Shafer Rupard attended her high school prom in North Carolina with a group of friends and, deciding not to conform to the typical sequin dress nonsense, wore a pair of red skinny pants. But shortly after she arrived, she was told by a teacher to leave. Initially, Rupard thought it was because of the leather jacket she was wearing, which she offered to remove, but the teacher said, Nope. It's the pants. Shafer left the dance and, despite there being no dress code for prom, is yet to receive an apology from the school.

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    Wow. That sure didn't take long. Guess what's on the cover of the latest issue of Life & Style magazine? Yep. You guessed it. A report speculating that Khloe Kardashian and French Montana are having a baby together.

    No, really. That's the headline -- "Khloe's Big News: A Baby With Her New Man ..."

    Oh, and a "source" close to Khloe and French told the mag, "She hasn’t felt this happy in a long time. Friends keep telling her she deserves this, finally."

    Sigh. I think we can all agree that Khloe deserves to be happy in addition to having the family she's always wanted, but come on -- do you really think she's pregnant by a dude she's not even confirmed to be dating yet?

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    Did you happen to catch the Teen Mom 2 reunion special with Dr. Drew last night? Man ... it certainly delivered more than its fair share of Jenelle Evans and Chelsea Houska drama -- though that's kind of what makes the show worth tuning in for in the first place.

    And while fans are bound to have mixed reactions to what Jenelle and Chelsea and the men in their lives had to say -- you aren't going to believe what Jenelle is being made fun of for on Twitter today based on what went down on the show.

    Check out this tweet she posted -- it's gotta be about the most petty complaint she's ever received.

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    I know there's been a lot of really awful stories in the news lately, and I'm sorry to say that this one is no different. Sometimes it's just so hard to believe in a divine plan when horrible things keep happening to good people, like the tragedy that befell Miley Cyrus this weekend.

    Hospitalized since the 15th due to an allergic reaction to antibiotics, Miley Cyrus shared her gut-wrenching grief over missing an incredibly important day of celebration. As she wrote, "Boutta be the wackest 4/20 ever." Oh, it's nearly unthinkable that this happened to her so soon after losing her beloved pet dog, and her following message makes it clear that she's suffering more than any of us can possibly know.

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    Apparently the hookup rumor surrounding them isn't enough to satisfy some tastes, which is why there is now a story floating around saying Katy Perry wants to have Robert Pattinson's baby -- because duh, who doesn't?!?

    But wait -- this gets even better.

    Supposedly she's telling friends she really wants to get knocked up but that she's not interested in having a boyfriend or anything like that. Meaning she wants a child and figures Rob is the perfect specimen to supply her with one -- but she doesn't expect him to have any sort of romantic relationship with her.

    (Gee. How's that one going to work, exactly?)

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    In January, some evil genius took to the White House website to start a petition to deport Justin Bieber back to his native Canada. Not quite as evil genius as offering the Taco Bell breakfast menu to Canucks if they take him back, but evil genius enough.

    Anyway, the petition seeks to deport "the dangerous, reckless, destructive, and drug abusing" Biebs and revoke his green card. "He is a terrible influence on our nations youth," it states, before continuing, "We the people would like to remove Justin Bieber from our society."

    The White House finally issued an official non-response on Friday, as the petition closed in on 274,000 signatures.

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    Kim Kardashian's wedding is only five weeks away, and somehow she's managed to keep virtually every detail under wraps. We're left with the scraps of trying to determine who will deisgn her dress based on what outfit she wears at the airport -- we're getting desperate over here.

    But at least we're in good company with the wool over our eyes, because rumor has it that Kim's not even telling her sisters Kourtney, Khloe, Kendall, and Kylie anything either. Including the location!

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    What would you do if your child sat on a wooden bench at school and got a splinter in his or her behind? If you're like most parents, you'd probably get out the tweezers, go to work, and give your child a lollipop for being such a good patient.

    Not every parent shares this philosophy.

    After a 7-year-old boy, who's now 11, got a splinter in his bum from a bench at school, his parents sued. As in, they took legal action over a splinter. A court in Croyden, England, where the "incident" took place, awarded the boy almost $5,000 after they were told that the injury was going to leave a permanent scar.

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