One of the most memorable parts of the Super Bowl this year was when the camera caught Cameron Diaz feeding popcorn kernel by kernel to Yankee third-baseman and all around tool Alex Rodriquez. I can't remember which teams played in the game, but I remember those glorious three seconds in which A-Rod's rep went from bad to worse, and he was totally humiliated and emasculated by one of Hollywood's most annoying starlets. I loved every second. I'm a Red Sox fan.
Cameron loved the feeding frenzy, too! She loves popcorn! She loves baseball! She loves A-Rod and she doesn't care who knows it! She especially doesn't care if any studio heads find out she's head over heels for the ego-manical Yankee -- Cameron wants to make a rom com with him.
Sorry if that wasn't clear. She wants to make a romantic comedy movie with him, not just play house in real life. She wants to take her relationship to the silver screen. Oh joy.
Let's get the obvious stuff out of the way first. A-Rod is a douche that no one likes. So do you think we'll want to watch him stumble his way through a movie? I doubt he has the capacity to memorize lines, so I'm assuming he'll be starring as a mute baseball star who has a thing for leggy blonds with ripped arms and dimples that could hide a Twix bar.
Cameron has always struck me as the needy type; I mean, remember when she accosted ex Justin Timberlake on the red carpet about dating Jessica Biel? Yeesh. Awks. So her insecurities rise again and here she is thinking that the best way to keep an eye on A-Rod in the off-season is to work together in a movie. Some people would suggest a romantic getaway, or a cooking class Monday nights at Whole Foods, but Cameron thinks big, and thinks rarely. The letters "MLB", "AROD," and "WERK" combined in her head 'til poof! She's shopping the idea around to movie execs.
I'm on board with this project only if A-Rod gets attacked by a small dog in the movie or if he masturbates and has his semen dangling from his ear. Something About Mary remix, y'all!
Would you ever in a million years watch a romantic comedy starring Cameron Diaz and Alex Rodriguez?