MLB Dream Job Requires Insanity, Poor Math Skills

Lindsay Mannering
7

baseballDo you like baseball? Do you love baseball? Are you willing to have your muscles atrophy and go blind for baseball? If you or anyone you know would answer "yes" to those questions, then you're in luck. Major League Baseball is hiring and they're looking for someone who not only has unbridled enthusiasm for the sport, but someone who's a little nutso.

MLB says it's a baseball fan's dream job, and they're accepting applications from anyone. No experience needed. Must be willing to relocate to NYC for April to October (apartment paid for), must be a baseball expert, and must be terrible at math. Intrigued?

Some of the dream job requirements are as follows:

  • Must reside in a location picked by MLB in New York City for entire baseball season
  • Must be present in the location to observe all MLB regular season and postseason games during the 2011 season
  • Must share thoughts regarding games and topics of MLB interest via daily blogging, vlogging, and through social media platforms

Here's why the applicant must be bad at math, lest they understand what they're getting themselves into. There are 162 regular season games. There are 30 teams, which means there are 2,430 games a season. TWO THOUSAND FOUR HUNDRED THIRTY GAMES A SEASON.

Let's say the average game lasts three hours. That's 7,290 hours of games to watch between April and October, which comes to 303 non-stop days of watching baseball 24/7. Now either my math is wrong (possible) or the dream job is more like a nightmare consisting of baseball round the clock, and peeing into jars stationed by the couch.

And say the average viewer has four beers during a game. That comes to ... carry the one ... about 32 beers a day during the regular season. What is MLB doing to this person?!

I hope they install a big brother camera in the baseball expert's pad -- I can't wait to watch this person gain 500 pounds and lose their ability to walk. All for the love of the game, right kids?

Is this a dream job, or job from hell?


Photo via shawnzam/Flickr

Read More