Charlie Sheen apparently believes he's qualified to coach UCLA baseball players ... at least when it comes to just saying "no" to drugs. He was recently caught on camera by TMZ giving an out-of-the-blue DARE-style spiel to the college athletes.
Most notably, he told the kids:
Stay off the crack, drink chocolate milk, enjoy your moment. That's all I got!
Judging from all of his recent issues with 36-hour benders on coke, booze, hookers, porn stars, etc., this little improvisational pep talk was probably not something that the UCLA baseball coaches invited ...
Oh! Ha! I was right. According to a UCLA spokesperson who spoke with other celeb gossip site X17:
Charlie was not invited to speak with the team. He was hitting with some current and former major leaguers prior to UCLA practice went over to the group of our players on his way off the field and spoke briefly to them.
While the whole "don't do crack, drink chocolate milk" thing is kinda funny, I'm a little annoyed/disturbed by how the college athletes reacted to Charlie. As he graciously went around and shook hands with some of the guys, they applauded him. THEY were applauding him?! Yup. And when he was done, they shouted out, "Thanks!" "Thanks, man!" "Thank you, Charlie!" as if he had shared some kind of ground-shattering insight ... the meaning of life! Okay, not really. But they acted a bit starstruck and in awe of him.
See -- this is what's wrong with the world! Everyone knows Charlie Sheen is no role model. These young, hopefully healthy athletic guys think Charlie Sheen is "AWESOME, MAN!" when in reality, it really should be the other way around. One hundred-eighty degrees the other way around! Charlie knows it. He even told them they looked great out on the field. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Charlie, we know you wish you were still in your "moment" in your early 20s. You act like it all the time.
Oh well, at the very least, I guess it's better that Charlie is spending time hittin' a few balls than hittin' the crack pipe. Even if it means he feels he has to share his wacky words of wisdom with anyone around him.
Would you take advice from Charlie Sheen?
Image via Riccardo S. Savi/Getty