A few months ago, if someone would have asked me -- and trust me, someone would have asked me -- how I planned on giving birth, I would have said natural. Not, like, at home in a birthing tub natural, but sans any drugs natural -- no inducing, no pitocin, and definitely not an epidural.

I've never had anything against epidurals. Plenty of people I know have had them, and both they and their kids are perfectly fine. Before I got pregnant, I was planning on getting one myself. But the more things I started hearing about epidurals (how they totally numb you from the waist down; how you might not be able to push), and the more I realized that I'm not very good with drugs, I thought: Maybe it's not for me.

But now that I'm getting closer to my due date, an epidural is looking awfully attractive. Oops, did I just say that out loud?

Okay, so for the past few days, I've been getting educated by Alice and Eden on the end of the third trimester and getting labor started naturally via CafeMom Studio's Mom-Ed: Childbirth videos. It's been super helpful, super interesting stuff, but I've gotta say -- today's video takes the cake. The ladies talk about what happens once labor starts. And it's so not what I thought. Check out the video, then let's discuss.

Pregnancy is a game-changer. Not only does your life change forever, but your day-to-day becomes much different. One of the most stressful things can often be how hard pregnancy can be on the body. Sure you may be glowing, but those aches and pains, heartburn, and hemorrhoids are making you cranky. To top it all off, you can't just go taking a lot of medicine since many things aren't safe or the effects aren't really known when it comes to the baby inside your belly.

If you're planning on going a more natural or home-based route, or just want some easy pregnancy-safe OTC meds, I've got some suggestions approved by doctors.

On our first day of childbirth class, all the pregnant women and dads-to-be were given a large circle of paper to write our names on. We dutifully pinned them to our shirts and took our seats, at which point the instructor informed us that we should all take a good, hard look at those nametags.

"That piece of paper is the exact circumference of a fully dilated cervix," she announced. As one, we all turned to stare open-mouthed at each other's shirts, and the room fell silent. In the midst of what should have been a quiet, contemplative moment, a helpless snickering began in the back of the room. From where my husband and I sat, waggling our circles at each other. "MONSTER VAGINAAAAA," I whispered.

In terms of treating our childbirthing classes with respect and maturity, it all just went downhill from there.

One of the biggest reasons that I know of why women start supplementing with formula in the first couple weeks is because "baby's not gaining enough weight." While a 5 to 7 percent weight loss in the first couple of days after birth is considered totally normal, 10 percent can sometimes result in pediatricians telling the mother she must supplement.

However, recent studies show what many of us have suspected or deemed obvious for years: Babies whose mothers received IV fluids -- either to stabilize blood pressure, before an epidural or c-section, or sometimes just because -- have babies who lose more weight initially.

Why? Well, it's actually pretty simple.

Miranda Kerr is so perfect. Too perfect to believe she's actually a real human, in fact. The kind of perfect that forces all the average people to try to find something, anything about her that's not so perfect (is that a zit on her chin in that lingerie ad, gasp!) to make you feel a little less distant from her on the Perfect Human Scale. And not just in looks or those eyes, which I can't believe aren't contacts. She's cornered the Perfect Mom market, too. Perfect baby daddy, perfect pregnancy, perfect breastfeeding photos, perfect bikini body just THREE months after giving birth ...

Just when I thought the list couldn't get any longer, Kerr admits something shocking about her pregnancy with son Flynn, 7 months old. Kerr was in so much freaking pain extracting that 10-pound sack of bones and water out of her body cavity that she was in searing pain and actually thought she was going to die. And that is just about the best news I have ever heard.

No matter which side you fall on the circumcision debate, here's betting you're pretty glad you got to make your own choice. So what if you weren't allowed the choice? And the only thing you'd done "wrong" to lose that right was to be poor when you went into labor? 

While America debates the legality of San Francisco banning circumcision for all parents, it turns out moms on Medicaid in 17 states are already being denied the ability to make the choice for their little boys. State-sponsored health care won't pay for it. And Colorado is about to bring it to 18. The way legislators see it, when you're poor, you don't get to make health care choices about your child anymore.

Nothing pits pregnant women against each other like the following question: "Are you planning on a natural childbirth, or are you getting an epidural?" I understand. I have two children, and I've been on both side of the fence, not to mention the middle. And as it turned out, my first instinct was the right one.

Confused? I'll start at the beginning. I was 24 when I got pregnant with my first baby, my daughter, and was as idealistic as my age at the time would imply. Plus, I was raised by total hippies -- long before Whole Foods was a glimmer in the universe's eye, my mother was dragging me to hole-in-the-wall health food stores for wheat germ and carob.