Don't you get so sick and tired of hearing about celebrities who are back in their size-2 skinny jeans a few weeks after giving birth? Because as much as we'd all like our baby weight to magically fall off or disappear overnight, that phenomenon really only happens to a select few. And having celeb moms rub it in our faces that they didn't have to put one ounce of effort into shedding pregnancy pounds is maddening, and completely unfair.

That's why it's so refreshing to hear famous moms like Christina Applegate admit that losing baby weight is a real b&%ch -- and it's something she still thinks about 14 months after giving birth. She even admits that she still wears her maternity jeans because they're so comfortable. (And they are -- they really are.)

No one here at The Stir is saying Snooki is definitely pregnant. We just think she is. We have a whole room full of freelance forensics experts and dulas examining photos right now and we're expecting a conclusive statement any moment.

But in the meantime, let's talk about what Snooki should wear now that -- I mean, if -- she's pregnant. Because that tiny little body is going to get awfully round. That is, if she is indeed preggo. A woman Snooki's height is always in danger of resembling a beach ball when she gets pregnant. And a beach ball definitely belongs on Jersey Shore -- but that doesn't mean Snooki wants to be that ball.

Do you follow me? Let's look at some short lady maternity looks.

For the most part, I'm happy my pregnancy has taken place during the cooler months. There hasn't been a lot of sweating on my behalf, and I don't feel like I'm missing out on any fun outdoorsy activities. But one thing I am missing out on is getting to wear the coveted maternity maxi dress.

There really isn't a cuter, more put-together look than a good-fitting maxi when you're pregnant. They always seem to hug the body in all the right places, but most importantly, they're lightweight and super easy to throw on. No-brainer. So, yay you, if you recently found out you're expecting -- maxis are still all the rage this summer. Now ... how to accessorize them to set yourself apart?

Have you seen all of the trendy and totally chic maternity clothes that are on the racks these days? I mean -- there is some really cute stuff out there, and a lot of it is even made by designers that we already wore and loved before becoming pregnant. Who says that you have to totally give up your sense of style just because you've got a baby on board?

Of course, the last time I checked, pregnancy only lasts nine months. And while it is totally tempting to rush out and buy a few designer maternity dresses and a few pairs of your favorite designer maternity jeans, it can be kind of hard to justify the cost when you will only wear them for a few months out of the year.

But a new website, www.fashionforwardmaternity.com, has come up with a solution to this little dilemma. They actually offer a service where you can rent designer maternity duds instead of buying them. Genius, right?

I had two fairly easy pregnancies: no barfing, no intolerable mood swings, no complications that kept me off my feet, no stretch marks. When I think back on how I felt when I was pregnant, it's easy to come up with a litany of complaints (chronically stuffed-up nose, evil heartburn, wildly restless legs at night, inexplicable addiction to that beige liverwurst paste that comes in a tube, etc.), but really, I had it pretty good.

Truthfully, I think the issue that plagued me the most during my first pregnancy had nothing whatsoever to do with health or even comfort: it was my second trimester body image. You know, that awkward stage when you're no longer invisibly pregnant, or obviously pregnant—you're just ... incredibly misshapen.

OMG, you guys, I just read the most terrible news about Jessica Simpson's pregnancy! According to reports, Simpson is unknowingly—or worse, knowingly—putting her health and possibly even the health of her baby at risk ... all for the sake of VANITY.

What's she doing, you ask? Binding her belly with painful canvas restraints? Eating mercury-laden raw fish in an attempt to curb the carbs? Smoking a pack a day and guzzling directly from a bottle of grain alcohol while bungee-jumping and undergoing unnecessary X-rays AND changing the cat litter?

It's even worse: Simpson has been spotted wearing a pair of heels. OH, THE HUMANITY!

Jessica Simpson, first let me say congratulations! You look lovely pregnant, and good for you! I bet you'll make a perfectly acceptable mother who has a lot of help from trained professionals. We're all going to be waiting anxiously to find out if it's a boy or a girl, if you lose that pregnancy weight real quick, how you feel about breastfeeding, and if you pick the most ridiculous name on the planet.

But first, can we talk about your baby daddy?

So maybe you've heard that Beyonce is designing a line of maternity clothing. No? Well, now you have. Apparently, if you're a perfectly proportioned superstar and style icon (who has other very-well-paid people pick out your absurdly expensive designer clothes for you), pregnancy is a fabulous fashion opportunity.

"I've had so much fun with fashion over the months," Beyonce gushed to Harper's Bazaar, adding, "All I see now are clothes that are flattering on a pregnant woman. It's been so exciting for me! I love figuring out designs that still make me feel edgy and sexy while pregnant. Flowy fabrics are always flattering, but I still rock my stilettos."

Hooray for Beyonce and for those of you out there who have managed to feel "fierce" and "sexy" while pregnant, but for me, dressing while pregnant was ... mmm ... not an "exciting" proposition.