Very often we tout how safe birth is, how it is a very natural thing that our bodies can do. And that is true ... mostly. Yet in a country as advanced as America, where we are able to invent computers and have cars that can park themselves, our maternal death rate is 16.7 per 100,000 births. That's more than Poland and Serbia combined. Each day, 1,000 women die in labor worldwide.

This is cause for alarm. Why are so many American women dying in childbirth? Is it the seeming rise in preeclampsia, a potentially deadly pregnancy disease, which I had? Is it the rising c-section rate? Is it negligence?

I cannot help but feel that we in America aren't doing enough to take care of mothers or children. Or are we just not educating ourselves enough in the things that really matter?

There are times when a c-section is needed and thank goodness we have modern medicine to save lives and make sure baby is born healthy and mama is okay, too. But there are also times when a c-section is unnecessary, perhaps even driven by financial gain for the doctor. And that puts lives at risk. It denies a woman the chance at a natural birth. It sets the new mom up for a longer recovery. And I'll say it again because too many people think a cesarean is no big deal -- it comes with risks to mom and baby. No one should have to go through major surgery unless it's necessary.

Apparently the c-section rate in Puerto Rico is almost 50 percent and so an online campaign was born to help educate and empower mothers-to-be. It's a call to action. The video for the campaign is in Spanish but even if you can't speak the language, it's powerful to watch. I'll help translate.

Round up a group of 10 moms, and you'll hear 10 different birth stories. We all came to be mothers in different ways whether through home birth, highly medicated hospital birth, c-sections, adoption, or something in between. At the end of the day, if you have a healthy baby, you win. Yes, even those moms who had a hair appointment scheduled so they have to fit in an induction and/or c-section on their own schedule. (Really? Do these women exist outside of print and online parenting magazines?)

Regardless, we all want to know how to improve the health of women and babies, so when a study comes out that highlights the connection between induction and c-sections, we should take note.

If I were a DJ, I would be shouting "This one is for the c-section mommies!" And then all the moms who have had cesareans would cheer "Wooooooo!" We need that. Women who have had c-sections for reasons beyond their control need to feel the love that moms who got to have the natural birth they wanted are allowed to feel. Moms who have had c-sections need and deserve respect and love for the way they birthed. We need to honor all ways of birth, even the ones that didn't go as we planned. Because it is still the way some children are brought into our lives. Hear me out. This isn't about being pro-cesarean. This is about being pro-mom.

You see, some people seem to think there are two kinds of moms -- those who have c-sections and those who do not. This 'battle' divides us, and makes one side feel like a mother who didn't do the right thing.

I had the pleasure of seeing Ina May Gaskin speak last year. She was inspirational and living proof how doing what you love and believe in makes you glow from the inside out. Gaskin is a midwife, arguably the most famous one, and her life's work has educated and empowered so many women on the beauty of natural birth.

Cue the anger of the women who had c-sections. Let's not get angry though; let's discuss. I had an emergency c-section. This isn't about when a cesarean is needed. This is about trusting our ability. This is about how we are misled because information out there is wrong. This is about taking back birth. And a midwife like Ina May can help us. Gaskin was given the Right Livelihood Award and is the first midwife to receive what is called the alternative Nobel Prize. Her acceptance speech was eye-opening as she talks about the rising numbers of c-sections and along with it the rising maternal death rates. This is why the topic of birth matters -- because we can die.

As the entire world at large knows, Beyonce gave birth to a baby girl this weekend, Blue Ivy Carter, via c-section at New York's Lenox Hill hospital. Judging from everything I've heard, it went great. Off without a hitch. Mom, dad, and baby are doing wonderfully.

But it wasn't great for the parents who happened to be having children at the same time -- in the same hospital -- as the pop star. Details that are being reported actually make their birthing and post-partum experiences seem downright miserable. Thanks to baby Blue, the non-famous moms and dads were supposedly ignored, basically put in lockdown, and one dad was even kept from seeing his sick twins. And, naturally, now they're all thinking of suing.

Beyonce had a baby girl named Blue Ivy Carter as I'm sure you've heard. I'm really happy for her and Jay-Z -- truly I am. But I am not happy about how things went down at Lenox Hill Hospital in NYC where she gave birth. I almost feel like I can't blame Beyonce and Jay-Z though. All they did was ask the hospital if they could rent out an entire floor while Beyonce had her scheduled c-section. The hospital could have said no. But a lot of money was paid and well, hospitals do need money, and so it was allowed.

And yes, scheduled cesarean. Maybe she had a preexisting condition that made a c-section inevitable. But maybe it was because of her celebrity status that her birth had to be planned in order for them to be able to rent out an entire floor at Lenox Hill. That just makes me sad. It's a bad example for moms. And I'm upset for the families and moms who were birthing there that were very disrupted as a result of all of this. Parents who were denied seeing their newborns.

I didn't have the birth I wanted to have. I envisioned something all natural. I imagined the hours of labor, my husband holding my hand, my doula encouraging me on. I wanted to feel every contraction. I wanted to experience a vaginal birth of my twins. But I didn't get that. I ended up with HELLP syndrome, the most life-threatening form of preeclampsia, and I had an emergency cesarean. I was numb. From the epidural. From the fear. From the many drugs I was given to help me.

My end result was two healthy babies and I recovered. I should have been happy. I was and am happy. But a part of me mourned the fact that I didn't get to feel birth. To truly feel my journey to motherhood -- my rite of passage. It has taken me two years, but I think I'm finally proud of my c-section scar.