Too Young to Have a Baby?

40

I'm going to turn the tables here -- let's start a little discussion on age and pregnancy, but not the age you expect.

I'm considered an old mom. I don't feel old, nor do I think I am old, but there are people who believe that I am too old to have kids. I'm 37. Expecting twins. First babies. Any day now.

I've read how some think I'll be more like a grandmother to my kids and won't be able to keep up with them and to this I say that's ridiculous. They will have their grandmas and I will be mom in high heels running around after them in the park.

But enough talk about older moms, what about young moms? How young is too young to be a mother?

Before we get into it, let me say this, and I've said it before -- what you think is right for you is one thing, but there are some who make blanket statements like No one over 30 should have babies. If that person said, I personally don't want to have babies past the age of 30 that is a whole different thing.

With some girls getting their period early, and having sex young, the possibility of getting pregnant is very real. Is 12 years old too young to become a mom?

For me, personally, I would think I would have been the worst mom ever at 12. At 16. At even 21. But then again, I don't know. I was never put in that position. And I know women who were and turned out to be amazing moms who raised incredible kids.

On this post about how young is too young to make a decision about a pregnancy, one mom had a great response if your daughter got pregnant at a young age. She said we can't make the decision for them, but we can guide them to make the right choice.

Do you believe there should be a set age for when a woman gets pregnant or do you believe it's up to the woman? Is there such a thing as too young or does it depend?

 

Related posts:

The Best Age to Have a Baby

How Young Is Too Young To Have a Baby?

What Age Do You Consider Too Young to Have a Baby?

motherhood, the pregnant life

40 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

piwife piwife

m sissters both had kids at 16. thye both graudtaed high school.one went to college theo ther straight to the work force. i ha dmy first at 19 and my second at 21. i always planned to have kids at a young age. inever wnated to have kids pass 26. am 22 now and am done. age doesnt make you a better mom. i know plenty of moms in their 30 who suck at being mothers. i think planning  akid should be done after highschool. now wnating to get pregnant at 13-17 is just plain stupid

kayla... kaylajean86

i think when you still love with your parents and jobless you are still to young...I got preg in HS....but i graduated 7 months preg and i moved out of my mom and dad i was on my 3rd yr of a job i had through out school...i did it all on my own.


I think to many mommy and daddy kids are getting everything they need from their parents not buying things for themselves

KatieP. KatieP.

Couldn't agree with Freela  more

RanaA... RanaAurora

Easy answer:  I know a 20 year old mom of two who is very dedicated, mature, informed, educated and does the BEST she can for her children.


I know plenty of women on this website in their later 30s and 40s who are pieces of trash and only aim to get their kids to shut up and leave them alone.


Age means very little.  Maturity is the most important bit, and HUMILITY to admit when you're wrong and grow from it, and dedicate your life and time to learning and improving.   That has nothing to do with age.


However... let's be frank.  It's UNLIKELY that a 16 year old is going to be able to support a child in a stable environment, do everything needed for that child, and continue to provide for that child.  Also, the rational, decision-making part of the brain finishes developing somewhere between 18-24 years old.  Prior to that, you're not mentally designed to be responsible for another life, but if you choose to be responsible, you can be, for sure.

mama2... mama23almost4

 I am not sure if there should be a set age but i really can't see being  mom at 12 i was still playing Barbie's secretly of coarse. However i did have my oldest son at 16 was i ready probably not but i sure got ready fast. I then had my 2nd daughter at 21 two days before my 22nd B-day then came my 2nd son at 26 and i think that was a great age i ahd plenty of patience by then and maybe being a mom twice before had a lot to so with it but i think 26 is the best age IMO to start a family. Now i am 29 pregnant with my 4th child  2nd daughter and i am all done after this. I would never change having my son at 16 we are so close and i love it but then again if i never had him i might think totally different and might think that 16 if far to young.

dorojas dorojas

i absolutly agree with alot of you, young moms are not necessarily bad moms, just higher risk that you're not prepared. i'm 22 and have a 21 months old and it was unplanned. i was over half way finished with college (i did graduate and am working on my masters) and it was extremely challenging. ideally i was planning on having children closer to 30-35 because i think it's easier when you're more settled, have a good job and you've developed a little more maturity. i obviously don't think high schoolers are ready for parenthood but i don't know that (excluding high schoolers) there is a right or wrong age. and i think there are pros and cons to having children early and later in life.

snowy... snowysakurasky

its more that you will miss out on stuff. 


i think some would be good mothers no matter their age, some bad mothers no matter their age, and some people really change and improve with age. personally, if i had waited, i could have acomplished more with education. school is REALLY hard when your brain is full of concerns and memories, etc of your child. 

happy... happymom1988

i think da women could be after 18 years old cuz before that is too early . to my believe , a lot of ppl who become parents too young ,somehow try to make up for their 'lost time'  later on in their lives as parents  and thats when their kids suffer .however , to me , being a good mom , depends more in whether you're willing to be a good mom , regardless t o your age . a lot of women decide that they want to have their kids around their mid 30s because tehy want to makle sure , they finish a career and hae a stable job , while others in their early 20s cuz they want to be "young " when their kids are in their 20s, so taht way they can still enjoy life and know that theire kid are old enough to take care of themselves !


like my parents are in their mid 40s , me and my siblings are on our 20s , so my parents can go out as often as they can , cuz we all moved out . lol


i might have sound confusing  lol


 


but as long as the ppl who decide to become parents , decide to be GOOD parents , then their age is not a problem !


congrats with your twins :)


im a twin lol


cornucopia

happy... happymom1988

also , im  young mom (im 21 ) , im a proud and happy mom to my dear and lovely 3 month old son , and i love it !

1smar... 1smartcookie

Of course there shouldn't be a set age. Everyone is different; some women are mature at 21 and some never will be, even at 45. Personally, I would never have been ready to have a baby before my twenties, but that's just me. I was 30 when I had my first, 34 for my second and now, at 42, just had my third.

11-20 of 40 comments First 1234 Last
F