MIL in the Delivery Room: Yes or No?

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MIL mother in law in the delivery room

Photo by Punkylu78

 

The question of who would be with me in the delivery room was an easy one -- I wanted my partner there, and no one else. Mom, extended family, friends? No thanks! But every mom-to-be is different.

When I interviewed Heather Armstrong (dooce) about her new book, she said her mom, sister, and stepdad were in the room with her and her husband when she gave birth. She wanted them to share in that intimate experience.

And I just read a post concerning this particular family member -- what about your mother-in-law in the delivery room? (Cafe Suzanne recently asked moms who've already delivered about MILs in attendance, too.)

Is she welcome when you give birth?

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Would you have your MIL in the delivery room?

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Total Votes: 378

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labor & delivery, the pregnant life

78 Comments

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kirst... kirstensmommie

My b/f's mom was in the room for both of my girls births, NEVER again!

Mom3P... Mom3Princess00

Our families were more than welcome to wait in the waiting room.  I feel that our births were PRIVATE moments for just my husband and I.  I did not want to be a side show attraction! 

BekaBug BekaBug

i guess this really does depend on the person. my best friend had her step mom, dad, father of baby and his mom in the room. no thank you. i dont even think my father would step foot near the room (door closed) let alone be in the room. i plan on having my husband and grandmother in the room. it would be my mom or mil but my grandmother has never seen a live birth. they put her to sleep for all hers but one and he was stilborn. so i've let her share in every u/s and pointment so far. i have no problem with either my mom or mil being there to share in what i know will be one of the greatest days in my life, they're two of my best friends.

Iza320 Iza320

I sure don't want that lady during my labor. She really hates me always making bad comments about me and my family so I really don't like her being part of any special things my husband and I do. She gave up my husband and his sibilings to be with another man, do you think I want this lady to be part of my life, of a special moment in our life? Nope, with my hubby, & my mom I am happy!!!angry

Iza320 Iza320

By the way with my first two babies that ended up being preemies, she never came to the hospital to see them. She came like a month later. I think this is wrong, she doesn't have any good feelings and then she thinks that by buying them gifts she is going to make things up I don't think so...

Ninja... NinjaMomma

I just told everyone if you weren't in the room for the conception, then you didn't need to be there for the birth.


Actually, it's a matter of wanting to be able to labor in peace and comfort.  The woman makes me uncomfortable so of course I wouldn't want her in there.  My own mother either.

mmmom... mmmommy0207

My MIL is the biggest gossip I've ever met. And she has absolutely no shame or discretion. She tells people how her pap smear went, so I know she'd have no problem telling all of her friends and random acquaintainces about the goings-on in my nether-regions. EEEWWWW!

teamq... teamquinn

I like ninja mommies answer, if you weren't in the room for the conception...

Iza320 Iza320

My mother in law is the same, if she can talk about something that isn't hers then she will, oh but anyone with Military background is her subject. She invited herself over this weekend. I hope I don't deliver this weekend, if I do and she wants to go in the room I will answer with Ninjas comment hehehe..

lovem... lovemybabys1106

She was with me the first time. I had DH, Mom, MIL and SIL plus all the docs and nurses.


Second time it was just me and DH because MIL had our oldest and my mom was out of state

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