Naming a Miscarried Baby

Cynthia Dermody
24

miscarriageThis is Cafe Cynthia, stopping by to chat in Pregnancy Buzz today.

It's hard to think about it, but miscarriage is a very real and very sad part of some pregnancies. Every mom finds her own way to deal with the loss -- and one of them is naming the deceased baby.

I was fortunate enough not to have experienced this, but I still felt a dagger through my heart talking to some moms in The CafeMom Newcomer's Club who've been sharing names of children they had miscarried.

Joseph Moses

David Johnson

Ria Ann ...

Why some moms decided to name their babies:

-- "I miscarried five children, and named each one. It helped us realize we have our angels in Heaven, looking out over us, and whom we are looking forward to meeting in Heaven one day."

-- -- "I named one of them only because we knew the gender and we desperately wanted him."

-- It does make it easier having names for them. Some people probably don't understand and that is okay. But my two miscarriages are two of the hardest things I have ever had to go through, and am still going through."

-- "A lot of people told me not to, but I named her Faith Victoria. It wasn't for anyone's approval, or anyone else's benefit. It was for me, a greiving momma, who wasn't about to dismiss my child because she was needed in Heaven."

And why other moms chose not to:

-- "Emotionally, I was too heartbroken to even think about anything, I don't know how to explain it. I felt like if I named him, it would make it too real and I didn't want it to be."

-- "I have lost three and have had names picked out for each one before I lost them. But I don't call the lost baby by a name ... I just can't go there."

++Do you know someone who named their miscarried child? Has it helped them or made the greiving process harder?

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