Should We Be Judging Nadya Suleman?

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I posted last week on IVF and who, if anyone, is at fault in the Nadya Suleman controversy. The doctor I spoke to said she thought the system had failed in the octo birth -- that the goal was too often a positive pregnancy test rather than focusing on a low-risk, healthy pregnancy. Never mind the issue of whether or not the parent in question can afford to take care of her 14 children. Cafe Kristen reported yesterday that Suleman told Dr. Phil Kaiser Permanente Medical Center may not let her take her babies home until she proves she can care for them.

Everyone seems to have an opinion about this bizarre, highly public case -- and momversation recently posted asking moms if we should be judging Nadya Suleman.

All of the women in the conversation were in agreement that it sure is hard not to judge -- 14 babies, what are you thinking, lady?! -- but where and how do we draw the lines around the ethics of multiple births?

Heather Armstrong of Dooce said it was a "dangerous road to go down when you start judging mothers and their families." And Karen Walrond of chookooloonks.com said in the end, the "decision to be a parent is an intensely personal thing."

Of course the debate goes beyond Suleman -- it's about reproductive freedom and thoughts around what it means for other families who choose to pursue IVF.

What do you think? Is there a "right" or a "wrong" when it comes to how many babies a woman should have? Do we have a right to judge Nadya Suleman? Check out the video and let me hear your thoughts.


in the news, twins & multiples

34 Comments

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debbym debbym

To Danny none of your business on being "okay" with what has "happened here" because that is like saying they should never have been born and that is not for you or anyone else to decide. She does not need your acceptance or approval to lead her own life. We have our own lives and to each his or her own. And to the person who said she does not have the mental capacity to raise them you are not a psychologist so that is stupid of you to say that.

debbym debbym

You know, when will the criticism stop? Rebecca it is still none of your business. I have children,8 of them and I get french manicures all the time. People in smoke should spend the money on food for their kids instead of cancer sticks. I am sure she has diapers! And food because her kids look great! So live your own life and get over yourself because you wouldn't say these hurtful things to her face.What's done is done.

debbym debbym

I mean people who smoke should care about what that does to their kids having to inhale that,now that is abuse

mumma28 mumma28

Her financial situation is a serious question. So is everyone's for that matter. I'd love to know the stats of people who have kids they didn't plan on and/or their financial ability to care for them. I bet we could limit that study to married couples only and we would get the same numbers. The fact is, again, referring to married couples, if any of us waited until we were financially stable to have kids, we would be too old to have patience for them. That being said, I am still against IVF because of the fact that some fertilized eggs get thrown out, and that equals abortion to me. The other problem I have is that not everyone was meant to be biological parents according to God's plan, so interveening in that area is morally wrong. I believe the inability to have kids is either a call to Foster or adopt orphans who need loving families, or in some cases, to remain childless because Someone thinks you cannot handle it or He has a different plan for your life. Remember, as it is evident in society, not everyone deserves a child. This opinion is not far fetched.

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