Mom Nonchalantly Tells Everyone About Daughter’s Miscarriage & Doesn’t See the Problem

iStock

Baby bump
iStock

A woman on Reddit was heartbroken when her mother shared some personal information after she explicitly told her not to. The woman had been facing a terrible challenge -- a recent pregnancy loss, which left her reeling. The last thing she wanted was for her heartbreaking news to become public knowledge, but sadly, her own mom couldn't keep her mouth shut.

  • The Redditor has been trying for a baby with her boyfriend since October.

    Quickly after they decided to expand their family, the original poster (OP) got to work, and by November, she was pregnant, she wrote in a post that has since been deleted.

  • Advertisement
  • Sadly, that pregnancy resulted in a miscarriage. When she got pregnant again in December, she thought she was safe.

    She'd read somewhere that a woman's body is more fertile "and can usually carry to full-term" following a miscarriage, so she was hopeful that this pregnancy would take.  

  • She decided to spill the beans on Christmas Eve to her dad and and stepmom.

    She was nervous -- her dad's opinion meant everything to her -- but "they were so excited!"

    "It was amazing, and my dad was all teary-eyed," she wrote.

    The next day, she decided to tell her mom, which seemed to go just as well.

    "My mom's been wanting a grandkid since I was like 16 and was bawling her eyes out in excitement and everything was going so well," she added.

  • Until it wasn't.

    Sadly, the OP miscarried again, and it broke her heart.

    "It was heartbreaking," she wrote. "I told my parents that I didn’t want anyone to know except who I [already] told, which dad and step-mom respected completely, and I thought mom and her family did, as well."

  • But her mother seemed to have let their vow of silence slip.

    In fact, it turned out that her mother was telling all of her coworkers and customers. It was a "total violation of our privacy, and we were and still our mourning the loss of our babies."

    The OP confronted her mom about it, but she defended herself and said "she sees absolutely nothing wrong with it."

  • The OP threatened to not tell her mother when they started trying again for a baby.

    The OP said that she would only tell her boyfriend if she got pregnant again. 

    “So what? You’re just not going to talk to me or see me for nine months,” her mother shot back. “Fine, just don’t even bother telling me next time."

  • Now, her mother hasn't spoken to her since January.

    Oddly enough, the OP feels like her life has been better since she cut her mom out of it.

    "I cut her out of my life, because of how toxic she’s been all my life to me," she wrote.

    It's a somewhat drastic step, although sometimes necessary, to sever these kinds of connections, which led the OP to question her action.

    "So am I the a--h---- for cutting my mom out of my life?" the OP wondered.

  • People didn't blame the OP for ghosting on her mother.


    "Your business is not the village's," one commenter wrote. "She has no right to display something so personal and private to the world. She seems like the type who makes it about her and her only. Wish you luck in trying again."

    "It's not at all a bad thing to remove people from your life who treat you badly," a second commenter agreed. "That includes people that are related by blood."

    "That was way out of line for her to talk to everyone about that," a third person chimed in. "I'm very sorry you have to go through with that."

  • At least one person thought the OP was taking this whole thing too far.


    "Your mom meant well," one person wrote in. "Get over yourself."

    In an update to her post, the OP added that for the most part she's forgiven her mother for her past, but both of them were stubborn and she just wanted a second opinion.

    But clearly, the internet is on the OP's side.

    "The amount of support I’ve received has been so amazing, thank you so, so much," she wrote.

miscarriage & loss