Parenting

The Magic of a First Pregnancy

woman looking at a positive pregnancy test

Now that I am an experienced and somewhat jaded mother of three, I look back longingly to my very first pregnancy.

Everything was so brand-new and exciting. My husband came with me to every single doctor’s appointment. He rubbed my belly. He rubbed my feet. We went eagerly and early to our childbirth classes. We both read books. Lots of books. I subscribed to parenting magazines, spent incredible amounts of time on the Internet, and welcomed advice from any woman who had ever had, wished to have, or would eventually have a baby. I shared sonograms, bare belly photos, and had three different baby showers thrown in my honor. I kept a journal of my deepest thoughts and feelings all the way through my pregnancy and beyond.

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I had a going-home-from-the-hospital outfit for my baby. And one for me. We wore our outfits home to an empty house because in an effort to form the perfect family bond, we kept both sets of long-distance grandparents at bay for a good two weeks.

We spent countless hours staring at our newborn and even more holding him. We three were one and I couldn’t imagine anything changing that dynamic.

And then I got pregnant again. This time I had morning sickness. And this time I had a 1 1/2-year-old. I didn’t have the time to wallow in my discomfort nor write about it. My husband was working longer and harder and he missed more doctor appointments than he made.

But we waddled our way through and out popped another beautiful baby. And two years later came the third.

As any mother will tell you, you love each one differently but equally. It doesn’t matter how many photographs you take, journals you write, or 1-year-old birthday bashes you throw. I’ve felt guilty that I barely recall the first few months of my third child’s life, but remember the very first Huggies I ever put on my first baby’s bottom.

I often go to CafeMom when I’m feeling these pangs of motherhood guilt. There’s a series of Mommy Must-Haves videos with great advice from a second-time pregnant mom. She’s so real and makes you realize you’re not in this alone. And after I watched them all (twice), I clicked on Huggies Register Your Wish and got all warm and fuzzy learning about this great opportunity for pregnant women to ask for something that’s really important to them. Check it out, and if you’ve got a bun in the oven, take a chance!

Anyway, back to the now-alleviated guilt. Even though I’ve forgotten how I even told my husband we were having a third baby, I will never, ever forget the magic of my first pregnancy. And thanks to life experience, I’ve come to terms with it. I’ve been a mother long enough to know that it doesn’t mean a thing. It isn’t a measure of love, but rather just a measure of where we were in the life of our family.

What are your best memories of your first pregnancy?

 

Image © iStock.com/AtnoYdur

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