Pregnancy To-Do List

5 Mistakes to Avoid When Announcing Your Pregnancy

A coworker of mine recently announced she was pregnant via a hilarious PowerPoint presentation -- a solid reminder that there are so many creative ways women can broadcast that they're embarking on this life-changing event. Yet what women often don't think about are the mistakes to avoid when announcing a pregnancy -- and these blunders are good to know, since they can taint your grand proclamation with bad blood. So be sure to never, ever announce your pregnancy in one of the following five ways.

Mistake #1: You announce "I'm pregnant!" at an event that's important to someone else. It's your sister's wedding or your nephew's high school graduation. And you come along to steal their thunder with "Guess what?!? I'm PREGGERS!!!" "I don't think so," says Alex Packer, family etiquette expert and author of How Rude! "Let them bask in their special day. Wait a bit longer before announcing yours." Or better yet, let people know before, since your wedding day avoidance of alcohol and all the chit chat about "So when are you two having kids?" might force the announcement before you're ready.

Mistake #2: You spill the beans to a gossipy coworker before you tell your boss. "If the boss learns secondhand that your pregnancy time clock has been punched, he or she might feel disrespected," warns Packer."After all, your maternity leave, even if it's six months, three weeks, and two days away, could disrupt the office, spook the clients, or rattle your shift mates. So, unless you can guarantee that your coworkers will keep the news top secret, let the head honcho be the first to hear your baby bells ring."

More from The Stir: 8 Great Ways to Tell the World: 'I'm Pregnant!'

pregnancy announcement etiquetteMistake #3: You announce your pregnancy too soon. "My mom used to say: Do not tell anyone until after the first trimester," says Julia Vergara, certified life coach. "Why did she say that? Because it takes those three months for a baby to show that he/she wants to stay in that belly. It is really sad to lose a baby through miscarriage, but it is worst to have to tell people about it because they knew you were pregnant."

Mistake #4: You announce your pregnancy on Facebook. "Tacky, tacky! Talk about 'DON'T Like,'" says Packer. "Make sure your family and friends hear the news from you before it goes viral. Tell them face to face, or by phone, or, at the very least, via a heartfelt email. Anything else is a recipe for hurt feelings, and you don't want future babysitters-in-law to have their feelings hurt."

More from The Stir: 15 Fabulous Pregnancy Announcement Ideas

Mistake #5: You complain about your pregnancy while breaking the news. Yes, pregnancy comes with aches and pains like nausea, discomfort, and insane worries about your future. "Of course there can be a downside to being pregnant. But keep it to yourself, your loved ones, and your closest friends," says Packer. "Remember that some of those to whom you announce the news may be unable to have children, may have been trying to get pregnant for years, or may not have found someone with whom to get pregnant, and would happily change places with you in a fetal heartbeat."

Did you make a mistake when announcing your pregnancy?

Images © Sollina Images/Blend Images/Corbis and ©

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kayba... kaybayblee3

I'm personally mindful when I talk about my pregnacy as #5 says, because I've been there. I've also had to tell everyone that I lost the baby during my first pregnancy after I had told them I was pregnant. I don't care if other's do it though. It's just when people constantly complain about every little thing about pregnancy all the time that irks me.

nonmember avatar Zanderbomb84

Ha, I had to convince my mother of #3 and #4 (don't announce it to soon, and don't let important people know via Fbook). This will be her first grandchild, and so we did tell her as soon as I found out. We had some fights about her telling family friends WAY before the first trimester was over, and pouting because we did not want her to post about my pregnancy on Facebook.

north... northernmommy

#1 hits home for me since my aunt announced her pregnancy at my baby shower for my first making her the focus of the whole event. Not only did my family seem to forget I was even there, my other aunts and Grandma that were supposed to be hosting the event even forgot about the cake amung other things because they were so busy fawing over the one aunt but what really hurt my feelings was when the party stealing aunt demanded I puck another name for my son cause if she ended up having a boy that was the name she wanted. I ended up keeping the name but even 11 years later is still bothers me sometimes how the whole baby shower went.

Cynthia Peters

I don't think announcing a pregnancy by Facebook is tacky. It's really a matter of personal taste and knowing the vibe of your family. I've never been one to want to broadcast many things since I'm a bit more private, but my husband immediately posted the news on FB when we found out we were expecting the second time. I didn't know he did it until I logged on. :) No one in the family took it bad, but they are more laid back about things. I suppose it depends on the family and how badly some of them want to be the first to get the news.

TheSi... TheSilence

Eh I have family and friends spread over the world. I announced on Facebook and everyone was happy.

cesca511 cesca511

My dad announced to my extended family that I was pregnant and getting married at my aunt's funeral. It wasn't even an old aunt that died after a long life, she was 34 and was killed in a car crash. Through the whole after burial reception I was getting awkward congratulations. It was not exactly the way I wanted to announce it.

sweet... sweetpea532

I hate when people say "we are pregnant" or " we were in labor" no we in that for sure!

Jsmit... Jsmith06040

#3 My last pregnancy I told everyone! Even made a big announcement on facebook (although I had already had 3 healthy children so no reason to fear right?? WRONG!) I found out I lost the baby a mere 2 weeks after having told everyone I was pregnant. It was really terrible having to retell everyone that I was not in fact pregnant.

nonmember avatar Holly

Disagreed on #3. I lost my baby the day after we decided to share the news at 10 weeks, and I am okay with that. It sucked having to tell people that I had a miscarriage, but it made coping a lot easier since I didn't have to tell people why I was depressed for weeks.

I think there's a little wiggle room on #1. I told my cousin at her rehearsal dinner that I was pregnant, and she encouraged me to share the news. Likewise, she had checked with me when announcing her engagement at my wedding, and I was elated.

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