6 Ways Not to Pick Your Baby's Name

naming babiesPicking a baby's name is easily one of the hardest things most pregnant women do during their nine-month incubation stint. It's almost impossible to choose a name that everyone agrees is beautiful and perfect. So you know what? Learn to stop caring what other people think. That's the ticket.

Of course, that doesn't mean that EVERY way people choose to name babies is the best. Personally, I am a big believer in a name with meaning. If he or she is not named for a deceased family member, then what about a famous person you admire or a poet who once moved you to tears? A season he or she was conceived in or a place that means a lot to you?

Naming a child ought to be something done with love and care, so while there are no wrong names, per se, there ARE wrong ways to choose them. Here are six ways no one should choose their baby names:


1.) From a stripper: You may have had a grand time with Stormy, the warrior goddess from Tucson, but guess what? Your child will have resumes to send out some day. She will want to be respectable. You will want to explain that her name came from your heart, not from your loins. You are looking for a million-dollar name and that's way too many dollar bills.

2.) Out of a name book: Oh I know, people do it all the time, but this just seems kind of boring. If you ARE going to go with a name book, at least make it a themed one. Are you Jewish? Choose a Hebrew baby name book. Italian? Great Italian names. At least then there is some heritage and tie to the past.

3.) Make one up: Look, everyone has a right to name how they see fit. But don't do this. Please. Mowaynatide will thank you. Sure, there are some beautiful made up names. They do exist. But more often than not, they just sound silly and wrong.

4.) Anything commercial (think Tide or Pepsi): Just. Don't. Do. It. It's wrong. It's cruel. It's not going to make you rich. Just tacky.

5.) Selling it on eBay: To any parent even contemplating selling their baby naming rights on eBay, think again. Anyone who would buy those rights PROBABLY doesn't have your child's best interests at heart. Just sayin'.

6.) Family pressure: You may have adored your Great Aunt Sivia and your mother may REALLY wish you would name your baby girl for her. If you like the name, grab it and run. But if not? Don't give in! Name your baby the name that fits you best. Or find a compromise. Whatever you do, don't end up hating your kid's name 10 years from now and wishing you'd told your mom to can it when you could. Stand tough!

How did you name your baby?


Image via Alan O'Rourke/Flickr

Read More >