Kristen Bell Faces Backlash Over 'Controversial' Pregnancy Admission

Say What!? 78

kristen bellThere are certain expectations the world has of pregnant women. As their bellies grow, so presumably must the love of that unborn child. But what happens if it doesn't? What happens if that bond never manifests? That was the brave confession of one Hollywood star. Kristen Bell says that she felt no connection to her unborn child during pregnancy.

I was floored by this admission -- not because of what she said, but by the fact she had the nerve to say it at all. That is something you don't hear very often from new mothers. Regardless of how tough pregnancy can be, we are hesitant to complain. We don't want to look ungrateful -- or worse, like a bad mother.

But I love that Kristen is lifting the veil, so to speak.

I love people the more I know them, and I didn't know her. It could've been a water bottle in my belly, that's about how connected I felt to her during my pregnancy ... But within about 24 hours after she came out, my hormones reset, and they reprogrammed my feelings about her.

I am sure she is not alone. When you are planning a family or first learn the news you are pregnant, you have these idyllic visions about what the experience will be like. You imagine your heart being filled with joy, delighting at every single moment until the baby arrives. Of course, reality is rarely so perfect. And for some -- even though they are happy at the thought of becoming parents -- the experience feels more like your body has turned into an incubator and little more. And for too long, there has been a sense of shame associated with feeling that way.

Kristen goes on to explain,

I kept saying to Dax in all sincerity during my pregnancy, "I just don't know how I'm going to like her as much as I like the dogs." I was being serious ... Because I f--king love my dogs; they are my children.

It's a reasonable fear. If you haven't felt that intense bond during pregnancy, it's normal to wonder if it will ever manifest. Fortunately for Kristen and most women, it kicks in soon after the baby is born. There is something about cradling that cute, little, helpless being in your arms that makes you want to protect her and make her life as wonderful as it can possibly be.

Though, I hope with Kristen's honesty, more women are encouraged to be open about how they really feel during pregnancy, regardless of what they are "supposed" to say.

How did you feel about your baby during pregnancy?


Image via vagueonthehow/Flickr

baby prep, celeb moms, motherhood, pregnant celebrities, newborns, bonding


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

miche... micheledo

My first pregnancy - there didn't seem to be a connection.  It was just strange to think it was a child inside of me.  But, for all my other pregnancies there was definitely a connection.  I think it was just that I 'knew' it really was a baby.  :)

Emmie25 Emmie25

my first and last i didnt feel a connection.

Roman... RomansMommy2011

With my first i didnt feel a connection while i was pregnant.. scared me half to death.i seriously.thought of giving him up for adoption.. but once he was born i fell head over.heels in love. This pregnancy is different. Im ready

Kathy Burgess

With our fourth (and last) child I felt this way, for the first time. She was a very unexpected "bonus" to our family, I think more for me was I thought I was done, my husband and I had just discussed a vasectomy the week before I found out I was pregnant. And on top of that I had a horrible labor and emergency c-section with my third child after two very easy births and short labors. But it all fell into place the second she was born and I heard her lusty cry, and now she is our sunshine, always singing and happy, and she is hilarious. Her arrival completed our family.

Katie Long

I think probably because I wanted Harmony sooo bad and she was planned, I had an instant connection. I knew I was pregnant before the test, and when I felt her kick me for the first time I couldn't contain my excitement. I'm not at all saying anything against the ones who said they didn't at all! I am just sharing my thoughts. 


Jamie Williams

i still like my dogs more than my kids...they act better..but i was excited and i so felt a connection with each one of my kids even before birth!!


gemin... geminigirls

I didn't have a connection with my first daughter...It just was awful because every one was happy except for me.  I was sick all the time and I was bloated. It wasn't until she was born that I just fell madly in love with her.

Corie Ring

why is it moms shame other moms on EVERYTHING??? we're all different.

Monica Wimsett

I felt that with my first born as well. I knew he was in there but I didn't know how to react with love. When he was born I still didn't know what to do or how to act. The moment I realized I loved my fist born son was the moment the docs wanted to do some tests on him and I didn't want him to leave my side. (my husband ran home real quick to shower and get a few things)they drew some blood and he screamed and cried and I cried thinking they were seriously hurting him.....I begged the docs to stop and they did and I picked him up and that would have been the very first time I told him that I loved him.

Taint... Tainted_Love

With my first I felt a real loving connection. She was a surprise, and not planned at all. But, I was happy and ready for her. She was my baby girl and I loved her with everything I had. My second one, I didn't even feel a connection after she was born. It wasn't until she was 2 weeks old that I REALLY felt a connection. More people know now, but the only person I told at first eas my husband. He was honestly scared that I didn't have feelings for our child. I took care of her just like I did our first. Even better since I was able to have more bonding time through breast feeding with our second child. But, I just didn't feel like she was mine. She belonged to someone else, and I knew it. Slowly though, I began to love her just as much as I love my first child.

1-10 of 78 comments 12345 Last