Parents Give Woman Their Dead Son's Sperm So They Can Be Grandparents

Say What!? 30

baby handA woman in Israel is now the proud mom of a 3-week-old baby -- who she conceived using a deceased man's sperm. When the man passed away from cancer six years ago, his parents were heartbroken not only with losing their son, but also having to come to terms with the realization that they would never be blessed with a grandchild.

But since he had his sperm frozen before he underwent cancer treatment, his mom and dad decided there was still a chance of having his legacy live on -- if they could find the right woman to carry his baby.

Obviously, they did wind up finding their perfect match. And now the new mom, identified simply as "A," is just as much a part of their family as she would've been had she and their son conceived this baby the old-fashioned way.

This mom is so intent on keeping her baby girl's father a part of her life, in fact, that she even has pictures of him in her home.

While on the one hand, it's so beautiful that the baby's grandparents have a piece of their son to hold on to, it's hard not to look at the situation from A's perspective. You have to wonder how she is not only managing to raise her baby alone, but doing so knowing that she has this biological connection to a man who she never met -- and he isn't even alive anymore. I mean, it's totally understandable for a wife who has lost her husband to want to use his frozen sperm to have his baby. Still, doesn't it seem a little odd to not only have a baby with a dead man, but also to honor his memory as if he were part of your life at one time? Something about it just seems ... complicated.

Yes, what A did for these people is wonderful in more ways than one, considering it also fulfilled her dream of becoming a mother.

But what will happen down the road if and when she falls in love, gets married, and possibly even has another baby? What if whoever she winds up with wants to adopt her daughter and raise her has his own? Will he be her dad -- or will it still be the sperm donor?

I guess we can only assume that she took all of those questions (and more) into consideration before agreeing to carry this child for the grandparents. In turn, hopefully they've thought about the notion of her life changing at some point, which would possibly alter their agreement and current relationship. And since the baby had absolutely no say in the matter, let's also hope that should things get to a point where they are no longer working, they'll put her best interests ahead of any personal feelings or issues that may make things harder than they have to be.

Do you think it was a good idea for this woman to conceive a baby this way?

 

Image via Kiwi Mikex/Flickr

fathers, trying to conceive

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LostS... LostSoul88

I think its kind of creepy that its a stranger.... Now if you were married to the man and he died that's a different story. But to each of their own. Congrats to the new mommya dn grandparents 

LSeab... LSeabolt1982

How is this any different to "A" than using a sperm donor. I dont think this is all THAT odd. To each his own.

nonmember avatar FarmersWife

I think this is science crossing the line of helping families to greed. While I don't agree with sperm donation or IVF anyway this is taking it way too far. I think the sperm donor should have to be living or consent to a specific woman who may carry or raise his child. (I say raise because of surrogacy). Consent should be necessary so a soldiers wife can still carry her husbands child after he passes. But hopefully prevent case of family who are purely selfish, as i believe this case is. I think this life was created out of greed and avoiding healing. The child's parents should be the driving force in creating life, not the grandparents forcing it to happen.

nonmember avatar Cass

There should be a consent form signed upon the storing of the sperm that specifies what it may be used for after his death. This seems extremely creepy and ethically dubious to me without his consent.

craft... craftycatVT

The man died from cancer at only 30 years old. Not sure it's wise to pass those genes on to a child.

prist... pristine729

I don't think it's different than using a sperm bank...

Pam.N.42 Pam.N.42

Those comment on consent, I bet he did consent to it as he was dying he probably requested this of his parents or else why would they have frozen his sperm? I do think its a little borderline sci-fi, but also if its something the woman agreed to than it seems cool and she gets to be a mom which is awesome for her!

Diana Means

I think if everyone in this equasion is Happy to each their own. They have a beautiful daughter/granddaughter and if she were to get married a loving extended family. Seems like a win to me

LTryon LTryon

What about those who donate to a sperm bank and then die before their sperm is used? Pretty much the same thing...

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