Husbands Who Drink During Their Wives' Pregnancies Are a Real Buzz Kill

Rant 29

beerThis past weekend, I had the pleasure of getting together with a few of my best friends from college for a mini-reunion, and it was just wonderful. And you know what was really a huge plus? One of them is about 23 weeks pregnant, so the rest of us had a built-in designated driver and didn't have to pull straws over who was going to lay off the booze on our night out.

And I have to admit -- I felt kinda bad about it. I mean, it had to be a real drag for her to watch all of us partake in the drinking when she couldn't even have one little sip. But then she told us that her husband is still on the sauce and has been dragging her to bars with him, baby bump and all -- which sort of made me feel less guilty.

But then I thought about it for a minute and felt even worse for her, because it really sucks that her hubby hasn't given up drinking for her sake. Truth be told, she seemed pretty annoyed by it -- because it really isn't fair for him to keep sucking back beers when she has to sacrifice alcohol for nine months straight.

Yes, you heard me right. I think it's totally unfair for dudes to drink regularly when their pregnant wives can't. Heck, we're already giving up our own bodies for nearly a year to house and grow their kid -- so kicking their drinking habit to the curb for that period of time is the least they can do. (Is that really too much to ask?)

Ok, so maybe it's a little bit extreme to ask your man to give up alcohol completely during your pregnancy, but if he's going to drink, he can at least do it around someone other than you. Look at it this way -- if the roles were reversed and he was the one who couldn't drink, would you continue to do so and rub it in his face? (I didn't think so.)

And now that I think about it, I really don't remember my own husband having much booze at all while we were expecting our son. Or at least I don't recall him getting liquored up when he was around me. Sure, he grabbed a cocktail after work a time or two with a friend, but for the most part, he was just as sober as I was. And even though I wouldn't have minded him having a glass of wine or two with dinner -- I truly appreciated his willingness to give up the booze as a courtesy to me. (Such a gent.)

I can only hope that if I ever were to have another baby, he'd be just as selfless the second time around and stick to ice tea and water.

Of course, after the baby arrives, it's another story entirely. No one should be expected to survive life with a newborn without a little help from the bottle.

Has your husband given up booze during your pregnancy?

 

Image via Tim Pearce, Los Gatos/Flickr

fathers, alcohol

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curly... curlycues

I dont think that is really a big deal. I wasn't able to lay on my back. Should he have had to sleep on his side too? While it may not be "fair" what in life really is? While I completely agree with his having sympathy for his wife and maybe not doing it right in her face, he has the right to drink a few if he feels like it. ( Mom of 4 so been there done that whole awful,for me at least, pregnancy thing and glad I have my 4 beautiful dears but wouldnt get pregnant again for a million bucks.)

BlueJane BlueJane

It's fine if he wanted to stop drinking while I was pregnant but I would never force him. It's not that big of a deal. I understand not drinking in front of an alcoholic but it's only 9 m that you're pregnant. Settle down.

B1Bomber B1Bomber

I didn't mind, but I stole sip here and there.

LostS... LostSoul88

I think the wife is a real buzz kill if she expects her husband to give up everything just because she has too. 

kassy129 kassy129

I completely agree with you.  I was sick of making all of the sacrafices while the TWO OF US were having a baby, so I told him it was only fair for him to give up drinking.  On occasion, he would ask nicely to go out with buddies, and that was totally fine with me, but  for the most part he gave it up, and it made me feel better.

szinna szinna

My husband has always been really good about this, a beer here or there if a game is on, whatever.  That doesn't bother me.  But my mother has been out to visit a few times during this pregnancy, and inevitably headed straight for my liquor cabinet.  It wouldn't bother me if it was a run of the mill drink, but she all of a sudden took a liking to MY favorite drink (manhattan) and drank 2-3 every. single. day.  in front of me.  It drove me up a wall!!

pezch... pezcharlotte

This is just silly.  I was pregnant. My husband wasn't so you know what he could absolutly have a drink.  If he said you know what I am not going to drink. Then fine but otherwise in my opinion it is just too controling and honestly silly. I went to France when I was pregnant. You are darn right that I told my husband to enjoy the wine (and the cheese and everything else) that I couldn't.

jrphelps jrphelps

My husband still drank.  It didn't bother me.  Although the drinking was done @ home or family functions & we didn't go to the bar.  I was the DD when I was pregnant & also when I was breastfeeding & I had my special cargo along with us :)

ruby_... ruby_jewel_04

I'm not an alcoholic. It doesn't bother me when people drink and I can't. I survived 4 pregnancies with my husband still able to have a few beers. 

jalaz77 jalaz77

I would rather him drink during my pregnancy than after the baby is born. My husband isn't a big drinker. Social, 1-2 times a month and its usually 2-3 beers or drinks. So it doesn't bother me.

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