Dad Heartbroken by Baby’s Death Struggles to Return Stroller to Store

Heartbreaking 117

strollerWhen the baby you're expecting dies just a few days before he or she is due it's devastating for the parents. You mourn. You wonder how to go on with your life. And then -- there's something I'd never thought about before: There's all the beautiful baby gifts and gear that will never be used by the child who just died.

A Dad told a story about the stuff left behind when his daughter died. His wife was staying a few days in the hospital, and he wanted to quickly clear their apartment of the baby gear. It would only make her heartbreak worse. There was the big, expensive stroller he had just bought at Babies 'R' Us. It was still in its box. He would have to return it. It symbolized so much to him.

I don’t quite know how to explain it, but this poor stroller became the bane of my existence. Just looking at it caused a flood of disappointment, anger, grief, you name it. I had to get it out of my house.

He did finally load it into his car and drove it to Babies 'R' Us -- but he'd brought the wrong receipt. The clerk hesitated, then offered him a gift card. Of course, without a baby, store credit was no use to him. But he was too sad to tell her why! Instead, he stumbled out of the store and back home.

More from The Stir: Baby Death From Shopping Cart Accident Serves as Warning

He waited a few more days, and finally he built up the nerve to call customer service. He explained his situation, and eventually got a full refund on his stroller. They also took him off their email and catalog mailing lists -- because they understood how painful that would be to him and his wife.

I just feel for this poor would-be dad. I'm glad his stroller problem was finally resolved, but what an ordeal on top of the pain he was already enduring. That stroller became a symbol -- the huge burden in his heart. He experienced one of the worst heartbreaks of parenthood without actually getting to be a parent. How cruel! But at least, in his struggle to rid himself of bane of his existence, he was treated with compassion after all.

Have you or anyone else you know ever suffered the death of a new baby?

 

Image via Graham and Sheila/Flickr

 

3rd trimester, emotions, fathers, miscarriage & loss

117 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

blunt... bluntcakes

Damn, that's so heartbreaking. I can only imagine their grief, I wish him and his family well and hopefully with time they'll try for another baby if that's what they'd like to do.

onefo... onefootcutiepie

Yep. I have been there. It's AWFUL

kjbug... kjbugsmom1517

One of my best friends lost a baby a few weeks before she was due. Heartbreaking

Freela Freela

Heartbreaking! A good friend lost her son at 35 weeks. She had just had a baby shower the weekend before. Her family asked her what she wanted done with the baby items- she chose to have them all removed before she was released from hospital because she couldn't stand to see them.

rhps2000 rhps2000

Yes. My baby girl was too small at 6 mos in utero and didn't thrive. She was with us for 11 days in the NICU. We had Medicaid at the time and continued to receive renewal forms with her name in the mail. Hurt every time. Byt my second son was born on her birthday two years later. He has a guardian angel.

twili... twilightsbella

May god mend the hearts of these people :( and as for the writer of this blog he is a dad not a would be dad.

twili... twilightsbella

Im sorry for ur loss rhps2000 :(

PRIMA487 PRIMA487

Too sad

dmorr... dmorris14

My son was stillborn 17 years ago.  I was at 38 weeks, so we had his room ready.  My husband wanted to put everything away in his room before I came home from the hospital, but I wanted and needed closure so we did it together.  It was a tough time.  On a happy note... thirteen months later, we had a healthy boy... and then another eighteen months later, we had another healthy boy. 

clust... clusterkid

My son was just shy of 3 months when he passed away in his sleep. I threw pretty much everything but his clothes into a huge dumpster just so I wouldn't have to deal with it.

1-10 of 117 comments 12345 Last