10 Justifiable Reasons for a Pregnant Woman to Do You Harm

Pregnancy 26

As if the symptoms of pregnancy aren’t bad enough, when you are expecting, everyone’s mission becomes to knock you down. Not literally, of course, because that would be attempted manslaughter, but knock you down nonetheless, they will try.

They will try by insulting your appearance, by questioning your choice of lunch-meat, and by noting just how much weight you have gained.

You have two options in responding: Stand there, gaping, racking your brain for an appropriate response, but instead just walking away and sticking a doughnut in your mouth, OR completely losing it on them. Delicious as the doughnut may be, these people are deserving of a pregnant woman's wrath, and YOU should be the one to give it to them.

They have it coming if they:

1. Argue with you over your due date.

2. Criticize your intended baby name.

3. Ask if you are carrying twins or triplets, and you aren't.

4. Comment on what you are eating.

5. Compare their pregnancy to yours.

6. Touch your belly.

7. Compare you to a circus or farm animal. It happens -- somebody actually told me I looked like an elephant.

8. Tell you that you look tired.

9. Insist that you breastfeed your unborn baby.

10. Ask if the baby was an accident.

How else are they ever going to learn?

 

Image via Scary Mommy

the pregnant life, pregnancy symptoms

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cmjaz cmjaz

Touching the belly is a big no no

Nancy View

my best friend got pregnant and a lot of people asked her "OMG!! What are you going to do?!" wtf is that?!


and yeah, I already hate being touched so if I ever choose to have children, anyone coming at me to rub the belly might lose a hand.

nonmember avatar Samantha

Ha, i get a kick out of this one. I dont agree with the comparing pregnancies thing though, unless they are obviously being snarky. Most women just like to remember their own & share their experiences with you. Its neat. Quite a few people didnt like the name i chose, especially not my grandfather. He told me shed hate me & why couldnt i just give her a common "normal" name!? Lol. I finally had my mother tell him he was seriously hurting my feelings & that her name was my choice. He adores her so who cares what her name is? My little 7 yr old cousin would tell me i was just fat, not pregnant, and that my baby was dead. Little brat. And my brother told me he couldnt wait til my kid was a teen so he could smoke pot with it. I told him id kill him. You gotta love the things people decide to tell you when youre expecting. Strangers were either really nice to me or scowled at me with disdain bc i was 19 & how dare i have a baby when im so young. They never said it.. you could see it in their eyes. You know type!

Rhond... RhondaVeggie

The twins comment is the worst IMO. When people ask my due date I can be pretty sure they're going to say I'm having twins. No question, they are just that sure. I had people accuse me of lying or try to tell me the doctor was mistaken when I was pregnant with my son too.

nonmember avatar jenna

I was never offended if anyone asked if I was having twins. My belly was HUGE. My body was still the normal size except for baby weight I gained, but my belly was so big that I myself wondered if another baby was hiding behind the other and would come out with a big surprise, so I was never offended. But I only got offended when I started to freak out about it and told them to stop and they didn't. And the comparing pregnancies thing didn't bother me either. I just took it as another woman wanting to share her experience. And people always asked if they could touch my belly first before they did. Sometimes I said no and they became offended, but I didn't care. It's my body.

eseng... esengbusch

I have had 1, 3, 5, 6 and 9 and over the weekend had a man tell me I was "fat" at a soccer game.

Tracy Shannon

I am a belly toucher. But only for close friends and family. I have no children and am fascinated by the whole thing.  The first time I touched my BF pregnant belly I was shocked that it is hard. LOL I try to keep a neutral face when people tell me the chosen names. As a teacher I often associate names with kids I have taught.

Kayla Still

aruguing over the gender pissed me off, the ultrasound person was right with my first daughter but cuz i didnt ask for that part printed out i had a perfect stranger tell me "oh so and so had an ultrasound 3 times and it said they were having a girl and it turned out a boy" well that person didnt to their job.. 

Carly Rau

my brother would ask how the little parasite was doing when i was pregnant, funny the first time, bit his head off the third lol my mom yelled at him too honestly i wouldnt have minded but that day at 9 months i was tired miserable, scared about labor as she was my first so i let him have it lol 

Todd Vrancic

Truly, a woman KNOWS if she is having multiples.  Asking the first time is okay, but if she says she is having one, BELIEVE her.

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