7 Ways Your Baby Will Turn You Into a Liar

Love & Learn 18

pinocchioBabies change different people in different ways, but there's one universal transformation for which all new parents should brace themselves -- your baby will make you a liar. Scoff if you will, but it's true. Even if you've been George-Washington honest your whole life, they'll turn you into Pinocchio before you know what hits you.

Giuliana Rancic recently realized this and told People how before she had a baby, she swore she'd never wave to her child during a live interview and say hi to him. She lied. “Okay, people do that all the time on the red carpet when I’m interviewing them at the Emmys or at the Oscars and I’m always like, ‘Really?’ And now I’ve done it twice today!”

It happens to all of us, in a variety of different ways. But it's inevitable really, and as your kids grow, so does the pile of lies. Here are seven ways my children have made a liar out of me.

1. I swore I'd never drive a minivan.

Hello Honda Odyssey, the most convenient car in the world for hauling around kids. Let me count the ways I love thee.

2. I swore I'd never let my kids wear clothing with cartoon characters emblazoned on them.

I've managed to limit them to pajamas and underwear so far, but when your little princess is begging for a princess shirt with those sweet big eyes, good taste takes a back seat.

3. I swore I'd never use saliva to clean their faces.

A mom's gotta do what a mom's gotta do, even if it is disgusting.

More from The Stir: 5 Lies Every Parent Should Tell Their Kids

4. I swore I'd never have a sticky, messy disaster of a car.

You know that aforementioned minivan I love so much? It may soon make the Superfund list of hazardous waste sites.

5. I swore I'd never raise my voice when addressing them.


6. I swore I'd never use food as a bribe.

Double, super-sized sigh.

7. I swore I never wanted to have kids.

Now I want nothing more than what's best for them.

What things has your child made you lie about?


Image via alainlm/Flickr

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Bruic... Bruickson

I swore I wouldn't let my daughter sleep in our bed.....that's not working out so well.

sofia... sofia0587

Lol almost all of the above except for the minivan I still won't get one hahaha

kelti... kelticmom

I swore I would never ever eat or drink after my kid. Yuck. Now I eat mysteriously soggy chips that I am handed, take licks from a sucker that he pulls out of his mouth and hands me and let him drink from my cup and try not to pay attention to most of the liquid going back DOWN the straw. Sigh.

nonmember avatar Natalie

I have the same "problem" as Bruickson...and #2 is on the way, with #1 not at all interested in sleeping in his own cot...

LSeab... LSeabolt1982

I swore I would never utter the words "wait til your father gets home" Oy

Rhodin Rhodin

I sort of solved the problem Bruickson has, by sleeping on the futon with YDD.  I have no idea how our marriage has survived these last 6 months.

corri... corrinacs

Most of these but the last one LOL.  I thought this was going to be a "gloom and doom" post, but nope.  It was pretty  funny :)

Lea Martin

I swore I would ever be one of those women who are wearing their pajamas in public.  Yep that's right the school secretary and the midnight cashier at walgreens have probably seem more of my pj's than my actual wardrobe :(


gamma4 gamma4

Well didn't say wouldn't drive minivan but never had one....tried not to have sticky car but.......never said wouldn't lol.....would never say #7 knew I always wanted babies

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