Childbirth Classes Are a Waste of Time

Rant 69

pregnant bellyIf you're debating over whether or not to enroll in childbirth classes at your local hospital before your little one arrives, let me spare you some grief -- because there are way better things to do with your time than sit in a room with a bunch of other expectant parents and try not to giggle at the fact that the instructor's breathing noises sound like something right out of the pages of Fifty Shades of Grey.

As nice and sweet as the whole concept of preparing pregnant moms for labor and delivery is, the truth is that unless you are 100 percent dead set on going the natural route with your birth plan, there's really just no good reason to subject yourself to those classes each week.

Like plenty of other moms-to-be, I too figured it was my duty to go ahead and enroll in childbirth classes, well -- because that's what you do when you're expecting your first baby. But I realized very quickly on after attending my first class that the curriculum wasn't exactly epidural-friendly -- and I was dead-set on having an epidural from the get-go. And considering I was living in Denver during my pregnancy, which is a city that really embraces all things natural -- I couldn't help but feel like I stuck out like a sore thumb because I wasn't too keen on sitting on a birthing ball or doing the whole "hoo-hoo-heeee" thing.

And another thing -- since I put on a good 50 pounds during my pregnancy, seeing a bunch of other pregnant women gathered in one place only made me even more self-conscious about the size of my growing belly, and instead of paying attention to the instructor, I found myself comparing my weight gain with what I estimated the other women to have put on. (Total ego killer.)

Now, I'm not saying that you'll get absolutely no decent take-aways from these classes if you decide to take them. If nothing else, maybe you'll get lucky and meet a few cool moms who you can arrange playdates with after the baby arrives. But unless you are truly interested in learning how to breathe like a champ and avoid any sort of pain medication during delivery at all costs -- save your time (and your money) and go out for dinner and movie with your husband instead. Odds are good you'll take away much more from those last few date nights that you will from any childbirth class.

Have you enrolled in childbirth classes? Are you getting any valuable information out of them?

 

Image via sapienssolutions/Flickr

baby prep, labor & delivery