Women who lie about taking their birth control, please meet the man who got a vasectomy and didn't tell his wife.
A woman writing in to an advice column on Slate says she and her husband, "Harry," struggled for two years with infertility. She blamed herself. She thought maybe it was that STD she got when she was a teenager. Her husband told her his sperm count was just fine. She suffered in silence until one fateful afternoon when she confided in her mother-in-law. That was when she found out Harry had gotten a vasectomy years ago and had never told her about it.
Not cool, Harry. NOT COOL. But there's more. Are you ready for his weaselly response when she confronted him?
Harry says he got that vasectomy years ago because he thought he'd never want children. And he was kinda, you know, passively hoping that his wife would just eventually drop it. "Oh well, no baby for us. Chinese for dinner tonight?" Shrug.
When has that EVER happened. That is not what baby-hungry women do.
Supposedly he's sorry and had NO IDEA that she was blaming herself. Right. And he's willing to reverse the vasectomy even though he doesn't really want a baby. So is this all just a terrible misunderstanding or is he a total sociopath whose seed should most definitely not get passed on to the next generation?
I guess you could make the case that maybe they don't communicate well with each other. But nope, I'm going with option B: He's a douche bag. Getting a secret vasectomy and not telling your wife is just plain unethical. This is just as bad as wives lying about taking their birth control pills. Maybe even worse.
Which do you think is worse, lying about taking your birth control or lying about your vasectomy?
Image via Bethd821/Flickr


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Comments 54
Oh and I also agree with you 100% on the wanting kids issue...I personally know a couple that the wife threw a hissy fit in a jealous rage when her bff gave birth and her husband finally gave in and said ok we can passively try...she got knocked up right away and she hasn't even given BIRTH yet and they're on the verge of divorce. A grown man won't ever change his mind about kids...
Lying/omitting about ANYTHING major can cause major issues within a marriage and eventually erode it to a divorce. Doesn't matter what it's about.
The only thing I have lied about was being late with shot simply because I didnt feel any where near the mood and didnt feel like explaining it so when I tell him I hadnt gotten my shot yet, he doesnt even mention it or press it because neither of us wants a child and we do not trust condoms on their own.
This guy is a Douch with a capital D. Time to kick him to the curb
The man doesn't want kids. That does not make him a Dbag. It makes him a male. Why make him reverse it if he doesn't want kids? If his wife wants kids so bad then she needs to divorce him and find a man that does.
I agree that what he did was wrong. But how does that make him a sociopath? That's a really strong word to use when you can only see one side of this story.
I think both are equally as bad. In each case, you are lying to your spouse. That is terrible.
Jerseysprincess - You are right, not wanting children doesn't make him a Dbag. Not telling her he got a vasectomy does.
This dude is a sociopath, plain and simple. He has no conscience, no remorse, might as well not have a soul. RUN girfriend RUN.