We tend to focus on the negative things in life. All of us do it for all kinds of things. Even when the negative thing has just a small percentage of even happening. Then the stress sets in, perhaps even upping that chance of the negative thing happening because of the stress. Terrible thing, isn't it? So I'm not going to do it right here right now when talking about older women becoming mothers. Not even when talking about women over 40 getting pregnant.
Just like when I got pregnant at my advanced maternal age, I didn't fixate on the statistics of potential issues I or my children could have. I focused on the good. And my outcome was better than good.
There are amazing first-time moms who are teenagers. There are fantastic first-time moms in their 20s. There are superb first-time moms in their 30s. And there are terrific first-time moms in their late-30s and 40s, too -- that age that once was considered ancient for having kids. Our life expectancy is rising; people are healthier longer; medicine has made phenomenal advances. It makes sense that there has been a rise in women 40 and over becoming moms ... for the first time or even the fifth time.
Though some feel that the recession has made many wait to have kids -- there is a study that showed it hasn't seemed to stop older women. But I'm not convinced there is too much of a correlation as far as money is concerned. I know many "older" moms -- and most of us are not wealthy and we have been affected by the recession -- some very much, some just a little. I even know women who have been laid off of work, unable to find a new job, and decided that this was a good time to have a baby. In those cases, the men in their lives were employed, so their was income coming into the household. Some of those women get lost in their job, put off having kids, and then one day think ... it's time!
However you come to your time to become a mother is your own personal journey -- whether it's by surprise or design. By mother nature or with a little help from modern medicine. We're all making amazing little babies.
For me, being an older mom, I think I learned patience deeper than I even thought I knew patience. I was very satisfied with my life so far, but I was so ready to have kids. I had many years of thinking about the day I became a mom, saw friends and family experience the joy, and knew I would be really ready someday. I was.
Mom Jessica Light, 43, talked to the Detroit Free Press on this older mom phenomenon. She has seven kids ranging in age from 6 months to 13 years. She said:
... in my 40s, I'm at the top of my game, and I have learned to live in the moment and be grateful for everything that I have been given. I don't waste any energy wishing this kid would sleep more at night.
Which is how I feel exactly. I'm happy. Grateful. I don't take any moment for granted. I don't feel old. I'm NOT old. Instead of seeing or thinking anything negative about an older mom, we should all instead focus on what is right. And what is right is very, very right.
Are you an older mom? Can you relate?
Image via Linda Cronin/Flickr
This Hot Dad Wants to Do Your Ironing
This Hot Dad Wants to Cook You Dinner
This Hot Dad Cooks AND Does the Dishes
Kanye West is Gay?! 
Comments 27
Wow - so sorry you all didn't/don't have good relationships with your Mom's. I think it's the person, not the age that makes you a good Mom. I was an angry, hateful, unstable person until I was in my 30's and am thankful I didn't have a kid until I was 37. Yeah, I may not be as physically able to do the amount of stuff as when I was in my 20's, but I am SO much more emotionally stable. I am also blessed with a wonderful kid who understands my physical limits and, so far, doesn't resent me for them. I would never have ben able to give her the love, patience, and emotional support I do now if I had had her any earlier. I feel blessed to be an older Mom and hope my daughter will always feel blessed to have me, even though I am not "perfect".
LOL yes because 16 year old moms arent....
I had my "bonus baby" at 38, and was worried sick thinking about risks, until my Doctor said he had patients my age trying to conceive for the firs time, she was my 3rd. after 15 years! Had no complications, recoverd fast after a c-section, and am glad as I can be to have had her at that age.
I'm 41 and due with my first in August, 2 months before I turn 42. Looking at me, you'd think I was 10 years younger. I have a young personality too. But I also have the age and experience to help me navigate parenthood. Yes, I would have liked to have kids sooner, but it wasn't meant to be. Bad relationship in my 20s and 30s that finally ended in divorce and then finally meeting my husband and marrying at 39. I feel blessed. We went through fertility treatments for a year and then the first month we gave up, we got pregnant, so I know this LO is meant to be.
I think in many ways I'll be a better mom because I got all the partying and wildness out of my system before kids. Now I can focus on my child and make her my priority.
I was 37 when I had my daughter who is 2 now. I had "advanced maternal age" thrown at me all the time while I was pregnant. It sort of gave me a complex! I don't think I would be the same kind of mom at 20 as I am at 39. My priorities were completely different. I do not have any problem keeping up with my daughter. I am not too old and fat to play with her. I am lucky enough to be able to stay at home with her, and we keep really busy! I had a great career, made really good money, and I do not feel like I gave up anything. We were so ready to have our daughter. Mom's can be great at any age, and they can also be bad at any age. It all depends on the type of mom you want to be! I love my daughter more than anything in this world and after many years of trying to have her, I am so happy to finally have this sweet, wonderful little girl in my life!
i love how commenters on this site will defend teen pregnancy with thier dying breath but freak out of having babies 35+. we get it, unless you concieve between the ages of 15 and 25- your children are doomed because its impossible to be a good mother outside that range.
now, can you have a seat and let the mature mothers enjoy thier "ancient" pregnancies please? thanks!