Khloe Kardashian is over-the-moon excited for the arrival of her first niece. Her sister Kourtney is due in a few weeks, and Khloe has big plans for the little princess.
At Kourtney's recent baby shower she told Us Weekly, "I have bought Kourt's daughter so many tutus. All I want to do is dip my niece in glitter and put a tutu on her!"
How adorable would that be? You know, if there was some kind of organic, non-choking-hazard type of glitter. I absolutely understand Khloe's dreams of dressing her niece in all that glitters, but I also find them a little concerning ... and not because I think she'd actually dip the baby in glitter. (She wouldn't really, would she?)
I had plenty of similar pink, poofy dreams when I was pregnant with my daughter. From the minute the doctor said, "It's a girl!" I started shopping for everything girly and lovely. I haven't stopped since either, but I have started shopping a little differently once I noticed just how all the frilly dresses and sparkles were becoming important to my daughter.
When at 2 she started eschewing things because "they're not beautiful," and I heard her start commenting on other people's outfits with ridiculous regularity, I started to worry about the messages I'm sending her. As a life-long shopping addict who loves nothing more than fashion magazines, beauty products, and new dresses for myself, it's all too easy for me to put way too much emphasis on my own physical appearance. That's the last thing I want to pass on to my daughter, but it's not easy to stop it from happening.
Nearly every day as we're out in public, at least 1 or 100 people tell my 3-year-old girl that she's pretty, or that they like her dress, or that she has pretty hair -- something about her physical appearance. That's fine, but the problem is that at some point that will stop, or at least taper off, and then what is she to think. Also, few people ever comment on my son's appearance, which won't be lost upon her for ever.
That doesn't mean I will stop buying my daughter tutus or pretty pink things. I don't think you have to dress your daughter in jeans and t-shirts in order to instill a good sense of self worth in her. I do, however, think it's important that we're at least aware of the messages we're sending and how much of an emphasis we place on how they (and we) look. It's fine to care what you look like, I just don't want it to ever define or limit her as it has me at various points in my life.
I'm working on it in little ways -- like when she insists on wearing her ratty old Chuck Taylors with an adorable little Lily Pulitzer dress, I shrug my shoulders (while cringing inwardly) and try not to make such a big deal of it. I also try to inject compliments that include words like "strong," "smart," "clever," and "brave" at least as often as those that involve her looking cute or pretty. I even try to refrain from asking my husband, "Do I look cute?" when I'm in front of her.
So I think it's great if Khloe wants to buy her little niece a ton of tutus, and I'm sure she'll be unbelievably adorable in them. I just hope she buys her some tennis shoes too -- maybe some without any glitter even.
Do you worry about your daughter being too obsessed with her appearance from a young age?
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