pregnantI know that there are some who are categorically against finding out the sex of their baby -- be it because of their religion, their superstitions, or the fact that they just like a good surprise. I am not one of those people. In fact, I am the opposite of one of those people. From the moment I found out I was pregnant, all I could think about was: When can I find out the sex?

I don't claim to be a patient person, or a woman who likes surprises. I'm not and I don't. But that's not the (main) reason I wanted to find out the sex so badly. I wanted to find out because, without that knowledge, I'm not sure how much I would have been able to connect with my unborn child.

Before I found out I was having a girl, I was positive I was having a boy. But, I couldn't be totally sure, of course. So, instead of referring to the little growing being inside of me as a "he," we referred to her as an "it." It felt odd and, to be honest, a little rude. You know, like how you're never supposed to refer to your mother as "she" or "her"?

Then there was the envisioning aspect of it all. Each day, when I rode the train to and from work, I would stare at mothers and daughters and mothers and sons, and wonder, "Which one will I be?" Will I be riding the train in a year's time with a little boy or a little girl? Like, I said, I was fairly sure it was a boy, but still. There was no way of knowing. No way of preparing. No fantasies to latch onto.

After the shock of learning we were having a girl wore off, I felt more, well, whole. Being able to say things like "my daughter" made me feel like a real mom-to-be, as opposed to a fraud, which, in a weird way, was kind of what I felt like. It may sound weird to some, and I know plenty will disagree, but for me, finding out the sex of my baby was one of, if not the most important part of my pregnancy. Actually, it was almost as exciting as finding out I was pregnant.

Did you find out the sex of your baby? Why or why not?

 

Image via Super Cozi/Flickr