jessica simpson pregnant marriedJessica Simpson, first let me say congratulations! You look lovely pregnant, and good for you! I bet you'll make a perfectly acceptable mother who has a lot of help from trained professionals. We're all going to be waiting anxiously to find out if it's a boy or a girl, if you lose that pregnancy weight real quick, how you feel about breastfeeding, and if you pick the most ridiculous name on the planet.

But first, can we talk about your baby daddy?

Now, I'm not a fan of actually using the term "baby daddy," but that's just one reason I think you and whatshisname should tie the knot before this baby gets his or her driver's license. The word on the street is that you're actually postponing the wedding due to the pregnancy. Now why in the world would you do that? If you want to fit into a super fly dress, let me tell you you're going to be waiting a long time after that baby is born to do that. Also, have you seen all of the cute wedding dresses they make just for preggos like you?

Even more importantly, if you love this man enough to have a baby with him, don't you love him enough to get married? With your dating and marriage history, Jessica, I don't think this pregnancy was an accident.

I feel you, Jessica. I was also a pregnant bride. Just like me, when you realized this was the right man, you let your guard down. I mean, it's no coincidence that I'd been having sex for tens of years without getting pregnant, yet once I met the man I actually wanted to have children with, well, look at that -- knocked up! I can't help but feel the same thing could have happened to you. (Side note: Good job on not doing this with John Mayer.)

So waddle on down the aisle, Jess. We all want to see him put a ring on it before you welcome your new baby girl, boy, or other.

Don't you think Jessica Simpson should get married, already?

 

Image via VersusLiveQuizShow/Flickr