Parenting

10 Ridiculous Baby Naming Trends to Avoid

Pregnancy 246

Naming a baby is one of the most important decisions you'll make in your parenting career. A single choice can dictate what nicknames your kid will get called, how professional they'll someday appear, and just how much they'll resent you someday.

I agonized over the decision for nine months, and even though I hardly picked the most original names on earth, at least my choices won't hinder my children's future success. Or so I hope.

Here, however, are some surefire ways to raise a child who will surely hate his name, and may just hate you for it ...

1. Pick a perfectly nice name and alter the spelling. Jaaynee, Lee-ahn, Mykal, Charlit. Why do that to a kid and force him or her into a life of correcting and explaining his own name. There's just no reason good enough.

2. Spell a name backward. Nevaeh (Heaven spelled backward) may just be the name that drives me the most crazy of all. Emiaja (Jaime spelled backwards) takes a close second. I just can't get on board with this trend.

3. Do something inexplicably strange. Like name a kid La-a, pronounced "La-dash-a." I mean, really.

4. Don't think about the combined name. Case in point? Drew Peacock. Just say it.

5. Give your kid a stripper name. Unless, of course, you want your Sparkle Princess to be a stripper.

6. Name your child after a product like Nivea or L'Oréal.

7. Give your twins matching names like Marc and Marcia or Richie and Rikki. Don't they share enough?

8. Name your child after a drug like Opium.

9. Take inspiration from movies. Star Wars is indeed a classic, but a name like Anakin is better left to Darth Vader.

10. Take inspiration from celebrities. Names like Pilot Inspektor, Sage Moonblood, and Audio Science are best left to celebrity parents. Those children never have a shot at a normal life, anyway.

 

Image via Flickr/nateone

celebrity babies, baby names

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ChicH... ChicHippie

I live in the south and am so so tired of double names.. even if they are sweet sometimes I'm just over it... AliBrooke, MariGrace, Ruby-Brooke, Lily Beth, Anna Grace, Mary Kirk... etc etc is it combined with a capital letter? Does it have a hyphen? Is there a space?! I never know. I usually just use the letters when writing their name: AB, LB, HG, MG, MK, etc.

poshkat poshkat

you forgot the popular names. i named my son Aiden. do you know how many aiden's are out there?!?!!? aiden, ayden, aidan, adan, aden.


i have a very unpopluar name (in the US, its very popular in israel) and i didnt want my son to have a weird name so i chose aiden. a mistake? maybe......we'll see.

DiANA... DiANAiVELiSSE

 Sorry to hear that the backwards one is on your NO-No list I named me daughter anaiD = Diana backwards, since I couldn't name her diana the 2nd (nor did I want to) neither did I want to name her Diana

clg1213 clg1213

rhyming is dangerous....my mom is ellen, her brother is alan...got hard when they got older and my g-parents couldn't tell who the person on the phone wanted just by their gender

Pua Smith

Everytime I meet someone who is named (or named their kid) after a product, I think of "Superstar!"


"WHY DON'T YOU GO DRINK A BOTTLE OF YOURSELF!?"

Ashleigh Munson

My name is Ashleigh, which I guess fits your criteria for #1. I love my name, even if I do have to correct people a lot. I named my daughter Calleigh. Same sort of thing, but I think she'll like her name too.

navyjen navyjen

I named my daughter Camryn and its against your #1 rule but to me its a more feminine way to spell it and looks prettier.

hotic... hoticedcoffee

I agree with all of these, especially the wacky spelling!  Taking an over-used name and spelling it wrong doens't make it different, it makes you look dumb.  Also, I was totally unaware that spelling names backwards is a trend....I'll have to start paying attention to the really weird names I come across, to see if they make more sense in my rearview mirror.  What a silly idea.


Oh, and I would add, be careful of names that promise greatness - I know a kid named "Wisdom", and I assure you, he falls short.

CoolR... CoolRelax

At navyjen - I have a niece that spells it the exact same way.  I think it's pretty and awsome. 


@hoticedcoffee - you just made my day with that Wisdom remark.  Too funny.


My girls have pretty standard names, Chloe and Simone.  But I do feel some kinda way about the fact that a friend has recently decided to name her soon to be born daughter Chloe as well.  I know Chloe isn't the most unique name ever, but no one else in our circle has the name - I wish she would choose something else.  But what can I say?  Clearly I think Chloe is an awsome name, lol.

starr... starrsitter

This one probably won't win me any friends, but I hate when people name all their (usually numerous) children names that start with the same letter. 


In my defense, my mother is one of 6 "C" names (parents were both C, too), so I'm calling out my own relatives here...

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