Parenting

No One Told Me THIS Happened in Pregnancy

Jenny Benjamin
14

table sawI have a confession to make, and I believe that by shining a light on this issue, perhaps other pregnant women will finally know the truth, a truth that their partners and loved ones might be keeping from them. In the last month, I've apparently started snoring. And so I'm told, it's not some wheezy, whispery sighs, but full-on, freight-train, plug-your-ears wood-sawing!

Snoring? But of course! I'm already ginormous, my swollen legs and feet now resemble giant tree trunks, and I seem to have developed a neck waddle. Why shouldn't I be snoring? I don't think I could feel any sexier than I do already. I'm just wondering why, among the many nasty things I've heard happen when you're pregnant, no one mentioned this particularly embarrassing one!

My theory: maybe pregnant women just don't know! In fact, I only found out that I was snoring when I started waking up in the middle of the night to discover that my husband wasn't there next to me. At first, I thought he was just having babies-on-the-way anxiety and was retreating to the den to watch TV. But then he admitted (nicely) that he couldn't sleep with all the racket coming out of my face.

"Come on," I said. "It can't be that bad." To which he responded, "Oh no, I'm just not used to it" with the same innocent, tell-no-lies face he plasters on when I ask if he's enjoying his whole wheat pasta. While it was so sweet of him to try and protect my feelings, I couldn't really ignore it any longer when I started waking myself up during naps with a "Whoa, what was that?" jolt. I'd look at him, then look around the room for the source of the disturbance. "Did something fall?" I'd ask. "Nope," he said. "That was you." So, yeah, I think it's actually that bad.

I've also been waking up in the morning with a stuffy nose and a headache, which I assumed must be related. When I asked my doctor about it, he said something about swollen nasal passages, common during pregnancy. Okay, so it's not my fault, but why hadn't I heard of this before? Of course, my friends had decided to tell me in great detail about constipation and hemorrhoids and belly rashes and stretch marks, but they skipped the thing about snoring? I'm thinking it's because, if it did happen to them, they just didn't know about it! In fact, when I told my BFF that I've been snoring, her husband confessed that she had been too towards the end of her pregnancy. Aha, a conspiracy among sweet, well-meaning husbands!

Alright, in the scheme of things, snoring really isn't that bad, especially when I consider all of the other icky symptoms (see above) that I apparently could have been cursed with. It's clearly harder on my husband than it is on me. But he refuses to wear ear plugs, and I really can't do anything about it, so thems the breaks. Hmmm ... no wonder he's suddenly so eager for our babies to get here though -- he thinks he might finally get some sleep!

Have you had any unexpected side effects during your pregnancy?


Image via BarelyFitz/Flickr

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