Not Revealing Baby's Sex Will Make In-Laws Hate You


baby bootiesFresh off of his Grammy win, Matt Bellamy and his baby mama Kate Hudson gave us some news -- they will not find out the gender of their baby. 

It's one of the big decisions you make while you are preggers. One of those decisions made at around 20 weeks, when ultrasounds will be able to tell if there's a little winky (or not) on your baby.

Pregnant ladies are on two teams: Team Want to Be Surprised or Team Want to Know. I don't think one team is better than the other ... but your family members may disagree.  

The thing about pregnancy is that it's long and it feels longer than it actually is, at times. That's nature's way of giving everyone time to prepare for this huge event. To prepare emotionally for the baby's arrival and prepare the home for the baby's arrival. Think about those nesting impulses that kick in -- those have been around for eons to make mothers prepare for what's about to happen.

So -- and I'm just throwin' this out there -- if you don't find out the sex of your baby, you may be fine with it, but it may not allow those around you to properly prepare for the impending arrival. I'm not meaning to cause trouble or strife in Pregnant Paradise, but Pappy and Meemaw may be a little peeved you aren't finding out.

In other words, when you don't find out the gender of the kiddo, you're pissing people off.

The main reason? People want to buy you gifts. Gifts you will want. Gifts you won't return. If you don't like beige or green or yellow, if you want pink stuff for your little princess or blue caps for your bambino AND you aren't finding out the gender, then it makes it a pain for those trying to give you things.

Luckily, there's a new site out there that's supposed make it easier to register when you are on Team Want to Be Surprised. Called Not Finding Out, they know what the gender will be (via some card your doc fills out). You register for items and when people shop for you, they can select "blue or pink" and the correct color gift is sent once the baby has arrived. 

It sounds a little complicated, but it's an alternative to returning a bunch of light green onesies for pink ones once your little girl arrives.

Will you (or did you) find out the sex of your baby?


Image via handmaidenbymaria/Flickr


baby showers, baby prep, boy or girl


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miche... micheledo

We were surprised with our first.  With our second we found out the sex . . . and refused to tell anyone!!  I highly recommend that method.  It was SO much fun.  :D 

Other people: "Do you know what you are having?"

Us: "Yes, we do"

Silence. . . . then, "So what is it."

Us, big grin: "Oh, we are not telling anyone!!!"

Haaaa haaaa.

We had pity and told people on our fourth.

Littl... LittleManMama

So what if it pisses other people off? It is not their baby!! We chose to be surprised and definitely felt irritation from family members. When you are pregnant everyone feels such a right to your baby. It seemed invasive to me. It was beautiful to be surprised. And you know what, I loved all the sweet green and yellow things we received.

nonmember avatar E

Or you could keep the light green onesies and dress your daughter (or son) in them? My parents thought I was going to be a boy until the moment I was born. I had a blue bedroom, blue blankets, lots of blue/"boy" clothes...I turned out ok!

momto... momtothemax2910

Pissing other people off or not has zero influence on at what point I find out the sex of my child be it at birth or at an ultrasound.

If they want to give gifts great. If not that's cool. If they want to make sure it's specifically for a boy or girl they can buy it after he or she is here.

Katie... Katie22106

I found out with my son, and we found out with this pregnancy, too (a girl!) And to be prepared is the exact reason we found out. My sister and SIL were both in Team Want To Be Surprised, and it annoyed me both times. But, it is their kid and it is up to them. When my sister said we were "ruining the surprise" by finding out, I told her that I didn't want to be surprised, that I like to plan. And I'm glad I did, because now I got rid of all the boy stuff (gave it away to my SIL and friends with boys or donated) to make room for the pink.

DebaLa DebaLa

We were fortunate. Our ILs were delighted, and supported our decision to be surprised as well. We agreed waiting til b-day is one of the few surprises left in life. We didn't bond with our unborn baby any differently or less because of it. However, my baby came to me in a dream a few days before, and announced there would be no c-section (yay!), and that she was a girl. Oh well. : /

Pbutt... Pbuttercup0625

I think its neat that we have the choice now to either be surprised or not be surprised...just a few short years ago (idk? maybe 40 at the most?) that option wasn't there. It was all "team be surprised".  So even though I can't handle surprises and want to know, I completely respect the women who choose to be surprised. Because there is no way in hell I could wait to find out.

Lynette Lynette

We found out for our first 2, both boys.  But baby #3 we waited.  Good gravy we drove my inlaws nuts.  My FIL the most!  LOL, but it was all in good fun.  And in the end, baby girl!

medic... medicwife

I found out with my first but if there's a second, I want to be surprised :)

medic... medicwife

I found out with my first but if there's a second, I want to be surprised :)

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