The name debate can get pretty heated, but last week in Boston, one argument spun out of control.
All Kimberly Nguyen, 35, wanted to do was hyphenate her baby's name and apparently, that was too much for the baby's father. He killed his girlfriend who was six months pregnant with their child all because she wanted to hyphenate the baby's last name.
Sick, sick, sick. I cannot imagine how terribly sad this must be for the family, including Nguyen's young daughter.
This tragedy obviously makes most people's arguments over Sophia or Natalie look like no big deal.
Obviously this man had mental issues that had nothing to do with the stress of naming a baby, but naming a baby can cause major issues even for families where there is no mental illness.
Some common scenarios:
- Problem: Your husband has a family name you hate. For example, you love the name Chelsi, but your husband is pushing for Sylvia since it was his grandmother's name and you hate it.
- Solution: Compromise. Offer to let him pick the middle name. After all, if you're going the traditional route, he gets to pick the last name. So you pick the first name and he gets the middle and last. Seems fair to us!
- Problem: You didn't change your last name and don't think it's fair that the baby have his last name only.
- Solution: Pick an alternative last name! Yes, seriously. People do it all the time. Combine them both (Brown and Smith become Brownsmith, for example) or give your baby the last name you always wanted. My dream was always to have the last name Purh. I would love to give that to my child.
- Problem: You agree on a boy's name, but not a girl's name.
- Solution: Hope it's a boy! Seriously, narrow it down and wait until the baby is born. You will be able to decide once she/he arrives.
- Problem: You just cannot agree on any names, period.
- Solution: Each pick your favorite and blend. In my family, my mother wanted to name my sister Madeline. My father wanted to name her Ariel. Her name is now Mariel. Perfect!
There are compromises and options and ways to agree on names and it is tragic and unfortunate that the alleged killer thought with his anger and not with his head. Our thoughts are with this family.
Image via Elisabeth0320/Flickr