3-Time Surrogate Mom: Could You Do It?

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pregnant

Could you go through this for someone else?

Pregnancy. It’s a long, long row to hoe even when you’re good at it -- god, that last trimester! But this woman’s been through it six times, and only three were hers. She’s a three-time surrogate mom who delivered a onesie, twins, and triplets for paying customers, and now she has set up a surrogate agency in Seattle.

Surrogate agencies abound, but I don’t think many are run by women who’ve, er, walked the walk.

It all got me thinking: Would I be able to be a surrogate?

The short answer is, no. I’m old as hell, I had a preemie the first time, and the second time, I spent my entire third trimester plotting ways to scare myself into early labor again. But the long answer is … being a uterus for rent seems really hard. You talk to the baby inside you. You nurture her with every bite you take. You lie there at night not sleeping because your hormones are going haywire. What’s it like to go through all that and hand the baby over?

I guess adoptive moms do that. And it's an amazing, amazing gift to give someone who can't carry a child, I'm not denying that. I would like to think I could, but carrying a baby is really intimate.

To me, it's less intimate to donate eggs. But I’ve talked to friends who say they’d rather carry a baby with no biological tie to them than donate an egg and let go of a genetic link like that.

I’d hand over 12 eggs before I’d carry a baby for someone. I’m fighting my way back to my own body after giving birth. I don’t even recognize myself from the neck down.

How about you? Could you be a surrogate? Could you give up an egg? If you had to, which would you choose?


Image via SeansMomma/CafeMom


childbirth, twins & more, adoption