Does Pregnancy Make You Crass?

Annie Krasnow

toiletI feel like when you're pregnant, there are certain elements of privacy that go out the window. I would never normally show my bare stomach to my friends. I would not spend four hours a day talking about heartburn, and I certainly wouldn't discuss pooping with my husband, let alone show him how it's done.

BUT, now that I'm with child, my filter has been removed and the bathroom door has opened. I think this may have been a mistake.

Being pregnant is a very mature state of being. It forces you to grow up and avoid sweating the small stuff. It puts your priorities in order and clears your head of bullshit. You have to be prepared for real life, and 30 is the new 20 is more like 30 is the new 40.

You now tell your doctor the truth about how many drinks you consume in a week. You eat salad because you know your body needs something green, not because it will make you skinny. You take a job for the money, not because it's a step towards achieving your dream career. You admit to your husband that you actually have gas and you do poop. Or I should say, you just don't have the energy to hide it anymore. Plus, it's likely that I'll poop during birth, so I may as well start doing it in front of him now.

I always felt like it's an immature mindset for men to think that the women they love don't shit. It's like, right -- we also don't have opinions and we LOVE cleaning up after you. It just seemed so outdated. Now that I've had the open door policy going for a while, I think I've made a mistake. I think that by acting on principle, I've ruined a little of the mystery of my femininity. It's like how can my bra look sexy if he sees me readjusting my boobs to fit them in correctly? I think once baby comes, I'm closing the door again.

Does pregnancy blow the door off previously private things you once hid from your husband? Do you think the door should stay closed when it comes to number 2?


Image via laurelephant/Flickr

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