When Pretending You're Not Pregnant Is Better

Jeanne Sager
11

pregnant bellyThe airlines are raising the white flag this month after a host of pregnant women has climbed onto airplanes despite a long list of warnings not to risk it. Some of them make it off. Then there's the Filipino woman who gave birth in an airplane toilet a few weeks ago.

Oops?

Sometimes, ladies, you just have to fake it. Like the woman who had been a perpetual student and was finally getting her doctorate degree from a college that was several days worth of driving away from her home. So what if her baby was due in two weeks? She and her cankles were taking that flight (baby came late, by the way, everything was fine).

So when else is it totally OK to throw on a guy's shirt and pretend you're smuggling a basketball?

1. Job Interview. Sure, it's against the law to discriminate against pregnant women, but have you read the news lately? It happens ... all ... the ... time. And in this economy, you may not get another chance.

2. Speed Dating. Who knows if you're going to actually see these guys again? Live it up and find out if he's even got "one night stand" in him before you blow the lid on your growing secret.

3. Going to the Bar. Let's face it, you don't have to actually be drinking to go to a bar. So let's hold the sanctimony and just let her enjoy a night out with her cranberry and seltzer without giving her the once over for being, gasp, in a bar while, gasp, pregnant!

4. Running a Race. Women can do it, but as a recent post on The Stir about world class runner (and mom) Kara Goucher showed, other women get awfully judgy about it. The fact is, women who go to the doctor and get the all-clear don't need to deal with the comments and questions.

5. Loan Application. It's hard out there for a mama just trying to make a nest. The rash of mortgage companies saying no to pregnant women regardless of their plans for going back to work after baby's born makes it OK to skirt the rules.

6. Going to Sushi Bar. Raw fish, raw schmish. Lady with a craving here.

7. At the Carnival. It's only in town for two days, who cares what that sign says on the roller coaster? You're pretty used to throwing up these days anyway.

8. At Work. Conventional wisdom says your chances of miscarriage in the first trimester make it unwise to share the news until 12 weeks. Why set off a crazy chain of events at work until you're absolutely certain?

9. When You're Hanging With an Infertile Friend. The time to tell someone you're pregnant isn't right after they spill their guts about their complete inability to conceive. Give it a month ... or five to ease them into it.

10. Meeting His Parents. If this is the first time you're meeting them, how about breaking them in slowly, shall we? First meeting: Hi, I'm dating your son. Second meeting: Hi, Granny!

11. Running Into an Old Crush. Because he's your past life -- you don't have to get into every stinking detail of the current one.

Have you hidden your pregnancy?

 

Image via Doede Boomsma/Flickr


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