Lily Allen, Her Fear-Filled Pregnancy, and Yours

Julie Ryan Evans

Lily AllenLily Allen, who recently announced she's expecting a boy, also revealed that her pregnancy has been filled with fear.

She suffered a miscarriage during her first pregnancy in 2008, and started off this pregnancy with a host of complications.

“I had about a week and a half of really heavy bleeding and had to have lots of scans … I’ve been living in fear for the past three months," Allen recently said.

While miscarriages and bleeding certainly heighten fears, I think most women enter at least some state of panic as soon as they see two lines on the stick ... no matter how calm and serene we try to be.

Sure, you've known for years all the biological facts that work together to create a baby, but when you realize all that is happening right there under your own shirt, it's incredible ... and incredibly overwhelming.

From the minute you know he's in there, you begin imagining his future; you start decorating her nursery and thinking about names. So to imagine anything happening to that precious little being you haven't even gotten a chance to lay eyes on yet is one of the scariest things imaginable.

Add in some infertility challenges, miscarriages, and other complications, and your every move can be tinged with fear. Going to the restroom is filled with trepidation as you check and re-check the toilet paper for tell-tale signs of blood. Relief fills your body when you find none.

But you have to will yourself not to go back in again and again.

The problem is all that stress isn't healthy. You've seen the studies -- pregnant stress can cause asthma; stress may cause miscarriage ... and a host of other things.

So you stress about not stressing.

Somewhere along the way, as the months and milestones pass, you let out a little breath; with each heartbeat heard you relax a little bit more.

But the fear will never leave, not once you deliver a baby, not once he walks or talks or heads off to school or gets married and has his own children. Fear is just part of the parenting gig ... from the moment you know you're going to be one.

So Lily Allen, you're not alone. No matter how nonchalant the rest of the pregnant women and mothers around you appear, know that we're all walking around with our own fears, just doing what we can so they don't overtake us.

Does your/did your pregnancy fill you with fear? Any tips for relaxation or stress management?

Image via Facebook

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