For as long as I can remember I knew that when I had a baby I wouldn't breastfeed. It's just something that would be very uncomfortable for me. I knew that I would take a lot of heat for this, but people always say, "Happy mommy = happy baby."
When I had my first child, I fed her formula and I think it's one of the best decisions I've ever made. Now that I'm pregnant with my second, I'm excited to not breastfeed AND I'm excited that I have no anxiety about it whatsoever.
It really is shocking how many people pressure women to breastfeed. People act as if it's cruel and selfish to give your baby formula.
There's little discussion about the fact most people my age weren't breastfed and don't seem to have any problems with allergies, immunity, or mother bonding. Also, few mention how this completely keeps the fathers from sharing in responsibilities of taking care of the baby. Also, it keeps women at home longer, keeps them away from their "normal" life, and it's much more difficult to measure how much food your baby is getting. Many women find it very difficult to breastfeed. It doesn't come naturally to them. It adds an added stress to the most stressful time in life.
I believe there are many women who don't actually want to breastfeed, but are pressured by peers and society to do so. Think about it. Are adopted children less loved by their mothers because they cannot breastfeed? What about fathers? I feel perfectly bonded to my daughter. And, my husband does as well. In fact, by sharing in her feedings when she was a newborn, our family became closer as a unit. She is also just as healthy as her breastfed friends.
It's such a relief to not have to worry about what others think of me this time. I know what works for me and my family and I hope other people will figure this out for themselves as well and not let others decide for them.
Image via Nerissa's Ring/Flickr
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Comments 365
Like others have said, I think it would be beneficial to explore why you are uncomfortable doing what God/nature intended. Who knows, there may be some underlying reason why you have issues with your boobs. To the point that you are excited not to use them, and go through the excruciating pain to dry them up.
Now that I think of it, that doesn't sound exciting at all. In fact, I think you are putting on a front to get under the skin of those who made you feel like shit. Mission accomplished! Now you can proceed in feeding your baby processed formula from another mammal while you work on drying up those mammary glands!
No kudos for you here either.
I think it's hilarious that you're "shocked" that people call it selfish to formula feed but then give one of the most selfish reasons fro not breastfeeding I've ever heard! "Also, it keeps women at home longer, keeps them away from their "normal" life" PLEASE!
You said breastfeeding can be difficult and doesn't always come naturally but what would you know about it? I think it's pathetic when women won't even TRY!
Good for you! Breastfeeding should be something you really want to do, not something you feel you HAVE to do. Although I firmly believe breastmilk is the perfect food for baby, formula is an acceptable substitute. There are a few organic formulas on the market.
The thing is if I adopted a baby I would still breast feed the child. I knew from a very young age that I was going to breast feed no matter what. I am currently breast feeding my 18 month old and I am perfectly happy with it. I breast fed my second child for 30 months. I had to stop because I was pregnant with my little girl and I was very sick. I was sad that I had to stop before we were both ready to. My oldest only breast fed for 11 months. I was no where near ready to stop with him. Yes my youngest kids still come to me when they want something. Yes my baby only wants me when she is tired or upset, but she still loves Daddy. She still has a special bond with him. It wouldn't matter if she was bottle fed I would still have been the one getting up in the middle of the night with her since he gets up very early to go to work and I stay at home. For me breast feeding was not an option it was a privilege that I would choose again and again.
And for those of you who enjoy bashing formula, let me point out there are those of us who had no choice but to use formula (I had a radical breast reduction-almost all milk ducts severed). And we don't appreciate being told we offered our child "inferior" nutrition. We offered our children the BEST of what was available to us. Would it have been better to let our babies starve??
With all the formula sponsorships and disposable diapers I am not suprised to read this disgusting article.
Obviously you missed health class where you learned that breastmilk is BEST for babies, or missed all the formula commercials saying breast is best, or missed the fact that the AAP and WHO recommend breastmilk as the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd choice while formula is a LAST RESORT recommendation.
Or you're just to selfish to care about the health of your children.
I am so not suprised cafemom posted this. I believe most of the members are american, and I wonder if you are to?
We have breasts and mammory glands for a reason, they are not just your husband's play things. They are there to nourish your children. It's sick that so many woman don't even want to breastfeed. Way to give your baby the best start in life: synthetic crap in a can. Woohoo!
Fallaya, focus that anger on getting formula to a healthy stage. Make it an acceptable option instead of the poison it is.
I think that most of the posters proved her right on at least one point, and that is the pressure woman are under too breastfeed.. I for one wasn't comfortable with it, but I did want my child fed breast milk so my initial plan had been to pump the breast milk so my child did get that benefit at least for the 1st few months..
.I don't agree with her talking about her life getting back to normal sooner, because I know too many breastfeeding mothers that go back to work, to school after the normal 6wks.. If their not its because it's their choice not to or their lazy and using the excuse they can't because they breastfeed.
I had a hard time from the beginning especially with my left breast, then I ended up having a few health issues and had to stop the breastmilk after 3wks. When my second was born I had no desire to go through what I'd went through with my son. So it was formula from day one and I don't regret it now. It was the right decision for me and I was a lot less stressed. And started to enjoy those 1st few months more, when I stopped guiltying myself over the fact I wasn't providing breastmilk..