Husbands Take Note: What NOT to Say to Your Pregnant Wife

Guy holding pregnant woman's breastsMy husband is famous in our little group of friends for saying really offensive things to me that somehow come off as funny. His one-liners during this pregnancy continue to impress while insult at the same time. Right after he says these things, he realizes he may not have chosen the right words. I almost feel bad for him.

Wait. Am I a sucker? Or is he just a man who doesn't know any better?

Here are some actual things he's said to me over the last few months:


"I'm so tired, I feel like I'm the pregnant one." He was tired from his long day at work. I worked too ... and woke up with our daughter, got her ready for school, made breakfast, went grocery shopping, cleaned, and made dinner.

"Woah! Your boobs are eeeeeee-normous." This wasn't said in an I-want-to-make-passionate-love-to-you type of way. He was more fascinated.

"After I make this fantasy baseball trade." I dropped a full glass bottle of olive oil and it broke into many messy pieces on my kitchen floor. This was his response when I yelled to him for help. My reaction was rated R.

"Well, you're not getting any smaller." He said this to me when I tried on a maternity shirt and asked him how I looked. It's true. I'm not, but really. Did he have to say it that way?

"Are you sure you want that second Skinny Cow?" I know he said that because I always complain that I feel too full after overeating, but there should be a law that men cannot comment on what a pregnant woman is eating.

What comments has your husband said to you during pregnancy that made you mad?


Image via .Mitch/Flickr

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