5 Reasons a Zombie Theme Park Would Be the Best Thing Ever

zombie kidsSo if (okay, when) the whole zombie apocalypse thing actually hits, where would you expect the walking dead to show up first? A thriving urban mecca like NYC? A Mississippi swamp? Staggering through the cornfields of Iowa? No, no, no. If entrepreneur Mark Siwak's hunch is right, that plague of nasties would initially descend upon a city with a "lot of abandoned buildings, blight, neighborhoods that are completely devastated." In other words, Detroit!

Makes sense, right? That's why Siwak is planning to open Z World Detroit, a zombie-themed amusement park that would "allow thrill-seeking guests to attempt surviving a night among the living dead." Based loosely on mega-popular zombie novel "World War Z," the destination would be a role-playing park (no rollercoasters, etc., which sucks) where actors dressed up like zombies would "attack" and "infect" guests, who would then, of course, become zombies too. Sounds like a dang good time to me!

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Not convinced Z World Detroit is gonna blow all those happy shiny theme parks out of the water? (Wait, there's still gonna be water during the zombie apocalypse, right? Hey, can zombies swim?! Because if they can't, it seems like a houseboat would be a good place to live.)

Anyway, a zombie-themed amusement park is exactly what the world needs right now. Here's why:

1. We totally need a place to practice our zombie-fighting skillz. Because no matter how many times you try to convince your co-workers that it would really be in their best interest to meet you at the park after work and re-enact scenes from The Walking Dead, the fools just won't listen. Already made plans, huh? Yeah, whatevs.

2. Zombies to Detroit = Cars to Old Detroit. Meaning, if a horde of undead can't bring Detroit back to life, nothing will. (Oh, the bitter irony!) Seriously, talk about a travel destination.

3. People who aren't good at anything else besides pretending to be zombies need jobs too.

4. The marketing potential of zombies as a brand hasn't been exploited nearly enough yet. Come on, you know you need at least 8 more t-shirts.

5. If we don't have a zombie-themed amusement park, we'll never have a zombie-themed casino or a zombie-themed hotel. And would it even matter if the world ended at that point?

Can I order my tickets now?! Sign me up!

Do you think a zombie-themed amusement park is a great idea?

 

Image via moggs oceanlane/Flickr

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