Zuccotti Park Protesters Should Occupy One of These 6 Fab Locations

occupy walls streetLate last night Occupy Wall Street protesters were evicted out of Zuccotti Park reportedly so the park can be cleaned. Last time the city attempted to temporarily oust the protesters, there was resistance -- protesters suspected this was actually a rouse to get rid of them permanently. Just now a judge ruled that the protesters can return to the park with all their gear, plus the protesters have a restraining order on the NYPD! 

I think it should be pretty clear at this point that OWS is the new normal. The Occupiers are not going to just shrug their shoulders and go home. But if they really did have to leave Zuccotti Park, where else could they go? This could actually be an opportunity. Winter is just around the corner -- I can think of a few places in this city where the protesters could stay warm and make an even bigger statement about the 1 percent. 

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1. Donald Trump's Bathroom. Actually, Donald Trump's anything would be appropriate, but surely his bathroom is large enough to hold all the protesters. I mean, look the bathroom on his private jet, for crying out loud. Say goodbye to your sanitation problems, plus there's all that free running water!

2. The Bank of America Tower Lobby. Remember when they tried to charge that $5 debit card fee? Argghhhh! What better symbol for the 99 percent's fury than this bank. And guess what -- their NYC headquarters building has a spacious, gorgeous lobby.

3. Downtown Manhattan Heliport. If you really want to mess with the 1 percent, mess with their wheels -- or their helicopters, anyway. This space is exposed to the elements so protesters would still need their tents. Still, imagine executives trying to fly off to their meetings, their homes in the Hamptons, their private islands -- and bam, a whole crew of people in their way!

4. Belvedere Castle in Central Park. Did you know there's a castle in Central Park? Right now it houses a nature observatory, so protesters would have to work around that. On the other hand, leading school tours through the castle would provide a great opportunity for outreach to the next generation of Occupiers.

5. Waldorf Astoria Ballroom. Why? Because it's where 1 percents' daughters hold their debutante ball, of course! And also because it's pretty and I hear the catering is magnificent.

6. Rockefeller Center. The holiday tree is going up there, so the place is already buzzing with tourists. I'm thinking the branches might provide some shelter from the elements. Plus, it's just a delightfully festive place to be this time of the year.

Yes, we know -- the magic of occupying Zuccotti Park is that it's legal. Technically it would be illegal for the protesters to occupy any of these spaces. But they can dream, can't they? In all seriousness, I'm hoping the protesters can continue their mission without disrupting life for the other 99 percenters in the city.

Do you think the city was right to forcibly evict protesters from Zuccotti Park?

 

Image via david_shankbone/Flickr

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