California Earthquake Turns West Coasters Into Ninny Poos

san fransiscoTwo earthquakes shook northern California on Thursday -- the first one was a magnitude 4.0 and hit the San Francisco Bay area at 2:41 p.m. The second, a 3.9, trembled along the Hayward fault line at 8:15 p.m. No real damage was done, but there were reports of art shaking on the wall of San Fran museums and some items fell off the shelves in stores and homes. Sounds like everyone and pretty much everything are OK after the quake, which is always important, buuuut West Coast? Remember when you all made fun of us East Coasters for freaking out over our great quake this summer?

Well who's freaking out now, bitches?!


You guys! That's who. And you're supposed to be used to a quake here and there! "California earthquake" and "San Francisco earthquake" have been trending all day long on Google because you all can't seem to get enough of the little shake, rattle, and roll that happened yesterday. Let me save you some time. The only news about the quake is that there is no news. Papers are covering how many people tweeted about it -- it's come to that.

So why the big fuss over there, huh, Californians? Seems like you guys are kind of getting a little obsessed with your two itty bitty little earthy-quakeys. What's your excuse for all the Google and Twitter searches, hmmm? Checking to see if you missed the report on how the can of beans fell off the shelf at Safeway Grocery? Hmmm?

And I hate to bring this up, because this isn't about winning, but uh, our East Coast earthquake was a 5.8. It cracked the Washington Monument for crying out loud, and it really scared my mom. So ... these 3.9/4.0 ones? Small potatoes, San Franners! Small potaters. I mean, come on. If you're going to lose your crap over a tremor or two, at least make sure they're worth it.

Fine. OK OK OK. Let's make a truce. We'll allow you guys to get all excited about earthquakes if you allow us to, too. Mmk? We can all, each and every one of us, get wide-eyed with wonder when our Earth moves. Because it's really cool/scary/interesting when it does, and we should all have the right to wanna know more about what had just happened. OK? Sound good? You freak out, we'll freak out (if it ever happens again), and we'll all live happily ever after. Kthxbai.

What do you think?


Photo via la case photo de got/Flickr

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