Liquefy Your Loved Ones in New Funeral Home Machine

watering canUntil today, I thought I would want to be cremated when I die. You know, have my ashes thrown over the side of my yacht near the coast of my private island by my four adoring children, three ex-husbands, and boyfriend Ryan Gosling. But I've changed my mind. Now I want to be liquefied when I die. Because that's a thing, j'all. A funeral home in Florida is now the proud owner of a body liquefying machine. The stainless steel behemoth can turn a dead body into a brown liquid in just about three hours.

It's being sold as an "environmentally safe" option of dealing with the dead. You can water your plants with dead bodies, if you wanted to -- it's that safe. Finally, right?


They're calling the body-liquefaction process resomation. Comes from the Greek word 'resoma,' which means 'rebirth of the human body.' After just a few hours of resomation, the body has been turned into a "brown, syrupy" liquid, and the bones have been weakened so much so that they're easily crushed and turned into dust.

The bone ash can be returned to the family, and the liquid, if you wanted, can be poured down the drain. Yep! Right into your town's water supply. No big deal. It's just your grandmother who's been turned into a small amount of liquid comprised of amino acids, peptides, salt, and sugar. No big deal at all.

Resomation is now legal in seven US states but has been a known option in Britain for a while now. Any way we look at it, our bodies are going to be messed with once we're dead. Rotting in a box six feet under or being burned in a furnace don't sound particularly awesome, and neither does resomation. Best part about it though is that we'll be dead, so yeah, no feelings.

If resomation is a greener way of going about my death and gives my loved ones a chance to pour my brown liquid goo over the side of my aforementioned yacht next to my aforementioned private island, I'm all for it. I've always liked swimming.

What do you think of liquefying the dead?


Photo via chichacha/Flickr

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