Fighter Jets Overreact When Plane's Passengers Spend Too Much Time on the Toilet

f 16 fighter jetFour F-16 fighter jets were sent to escort two commercial airline flights to safe landings after the flight attendants alerted officials for suspicious passenger behavior yesterday, the tenth anniversary of 9/11. On the American Airlines flight from Los Angeles to New York, three passengers made frequent trips to the bathroom, and on a Frontier Airlines flight from Denver to Detroit, two people spent a long time in the bathroom, together. Each flight got a pair of fighter jets to accompany them to their destinations, and once the planes landed, the total of six bathroom-break-loving passengers were questioned, cleared, and sent on their way. No harm, no foul. Right?

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The flight attendants followed normal procedure after observing the unusual frequency of visits to the loo (and possible hand signal communications made between the passengers), and the military used an abundance of caution. Turns out, long poops and maybe a couple trying to join the mile high club were what the F-16s were called in to protect.

Flying just ain't what it used to be. If having diarrhea on a flight isn't bad enough, being cuffed and chaperoned off the plane certainly adds insult to injury. But that couple in the bathroom together on the Detroit flight? Come on now. Doing it in a plane bathroom is just gross -- doing it in a plane bathroom on the tenth anniversary of 9/11 is just irresponsible.

The commercial flight crews didn't ask for the F-16 escort, but the military decided to act out of extreme caution. Better safe than sorry, I suppose. However, there was an air marshal on board the LA to NY flight, but he or she never revealed their identity. That seems a little odd to me -- why call in jets when the air marshal could've done something? Fighter jet escorts can't be cheap ...

There's a lesson in this for all of us -- on 9/11/2012, try and hold it if you're flying. And if you can't hold it, well, be prepared to be cuffed in the name of the safety of the country. Who knows -- maybe the passengers will be able to sell their stories and milk their continence concerns for all they're worth. After all, what's more American than an interview on the Today show?

Were you a little more anxious than usual on the anniversary of 9/11?


Photo via DVIDSHUB/Flickr

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