90-Year-Old Woman Is World's Best Crimebuster

old ladyIf someone says 90-year-old woman, what pops into your head first? Blue hair rinse? Constant kvetching about her rheumatism? Maybe a cardigan with a wee bit of cat hair on the sleeve? It sounds like someone needs a lesson on judging a book by its cover!

Here's guessing the 90-year-old German farmer who chased off a trio of thieves from her rural farmhouse with nothing but her cane would be happy to provide one. Reuters called her "feisty." The police called her "courageous." I just want to BE her.


My dad loves to joke that "when" he grows up, he'd like to be 80 or 90. I'll go one better on that. I'd like to be 80 or 90 but not act it. And this nervy nonagenarian renews my hope that I can one day be truly kickass too.

I'm betting the would-be burglars saw her as an easy mark. Old biddy in a rural farmhouse? I can almost imagine the scent of Elizabeth Taylor's White Diamonds or some such old lady perfume in the air. Perhaps some liniment? You can hear the two guys turning to their lady friend and saying, "We've so got this. Money in the bank!" (Or however you say it in German -- I'll have to ask my 91-year-old German grandfather.)

The fact that they got whacked with the cane and ran right out of the house serves them right for: a. disrespecting someone else's home with their plans to rob it and b. their ageist attitude.

Being old doesn't mean being down for the count. My late grandmother -- whose age I shall not share here because I'd prefer not having lightning bolts thrown down at me from the heavens today -- was my hero (heroine?) because she'd hop in a car and drive from New York to North Carolina in a day. She wasn't afraid of the distance. And you could TRUST HER DRIVING. You could trust her with your rambunctious 2-year-old too (although she might come home a tad bit sugared up from extra cookies). I'm almost sad my grandmother never reached the "I need a cane" stage. She probably would have made one helluva crimebuster.

Do you know any old ladies who would fight off a burglar without a second thought?


Image via Smath/Flickr

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