Feisty Grandma Kicks Burglar in Groin to Save Grandkids

wonder womanJessica Thomas, grandmother to a 10-year-old boy and 5-year-old girl, is one seriously tough cookie -- the Kansas City, Missouri native turns into a real bad ass if you mess with her beloved grandchildren.

The three of them were out for a short evening stroll last week, and when they returned home from their 15-minute walk, the front door of their home was kicked in. After realizing that an intruder was inside, Jessica scurried to the nearest phone booth, magically changed into a superhero outfit, and flew back to her house, fist first, to protect her family.

I mean, she's gotta be some sort of superhero since she was able to beat up the burglar even though he had a gun, tried to force the three of them into the house, and pistol whipped her. Go granny, go!


Jessica thinks her instincts took over. She told the local Kansas City news station KMBC that "you don't mess with the grandkids. That's the mother lion instinct." And she wasn't kidding.

She and the burglar started at it after she fought to stay on the porch and not go in the house because she was convinced that if they went inside, they were never coming out alive. The man then pistol whipped her, broke her arm, and cut her head badly enough that she required multiple stitches.

While Jessica may have been down, she wasn't out. She knew what she had to do:

I threw myself in front of the door and decided at that point I was going to make a field goal kick in his groin, and I did.

She got a solid line up and really nailed him in the sack. She hit him where it counts, and it probably saved her family. When asked if the burglar got away with anything, was able to take any of their possessions, Jessica coolly remarked that the only thing he left with was "sore balls and a limp." Snap.

But Jessica plans on returning to the stereotypical granny ways -- she intends to put a sign in her front yard letting the intruder know that she forgives him. No word yet if she also plans on baking him cookies and giving him a warm hug, but something tells me this granny isn't ready to retire her superhero title just yet -- these kids will need her protection for a few more years still.


Photo via andertoons/Flickr

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