Drug Scandal Makes Lance Armstrong a Bully

Lance ArmstrongPoor Ricky Gervais. All week people have been calling him a bully for his Golden Globes jokes, and all this time there was a real villain in our midst being ignored. Lance Armstrong is a drug pusher (allegedly anyway).

According to his teammates in an explosive Sports Illustrated report that seems to put the final nail in the "did he dope?" coffin, Armstrong was the "instigator" who pushed his fellow riders to use banned blood booster EPO. "It was his words that pushed us toward doing it," New Zealander Stephen Swart told SI.

Sound like your classic case of schoolyard bully? Oh, it gets better:


1. Lance has taken a haughty attitude toward the entire SI report. "I've perused it. There's nothing there," he told the AP. Ever notice how bullies believe they're above the fray?

2. When pressed on the drug scandal report, Lance got nasty: "Dude, are you that stupid? Which part of 'I'm not commenting' is not clear to you?" Hey, Armstrong, it's called kill them with kindness, not bash them over the head with what a jerk you are.

3. Fellow cyclist Floyd Landis -- who is a key in the federal probe into Armstrong's alleged doping -- says Lance was caught with syringes and drugs with Spanish labels when the duo flew into St. Moritz. When the paraphernalia sparked concern among the airport officials, Landis said Armstrong made someone else in the contingent convince them the drugs were "vitamins." Having someone else lie for you/do your dirty work -- classic bully.

4. Last year Outside Magazine Photoshopped the number 38 and letters BFD onto Lance's shirt for a cover shot. So did the cyclist call the magazine to complain or use his celebrity to argue against the real dangers of Photoshopping? Of course not! He took to Twitter to curse at the magazine:

Just saw the cover of the new Outside mag w/ yours truly on it. Nice photoshop on a plain t-shirt guys. That's some lame bullshit.

You know what's lame? Getting belligerent and using foul language because you don't like something someone has done. Sounds like, yes, let's say it, a bully.

5. Nobody puts Lance in a corner, especially not club bouncers who are simply trying to do their job by stopping the random guy from illegally leaving with a drink in hand. In 2008, Lance threw a much publicized hissy in a Texas club, berating the bouncer for daring to stop him and threatening to ensure the guy lost his job. When in doubt, bullies blame the other guy.

What do you think? Is Lance just a big bully?

Image via Facebook

Read More >