Rally to Restore Sanity: Don't Stomp Heads and Other Assembly Etiquette

political rally sign
Not an appropriate sign for Saturday.
No one knows how many people will descend on Washington's National Mall Saturday for Jon Stewart's Rally to Restore Sanity and the March to Keep Fear Alive hosted by Stephen Colbert. What is certain, however, is that these sanity seekers will likely need some etiquette rules to follow to ensure a well-behaved assembly.

There is one group that has had some experience with political gatherings of late. Taking a cue from the Tea Party ralliers, here are some rules of etiquette for Saturday's Rally to Restore Sanity.


--Stock up on throat lozenges. You'll need something to soothe those pipes after all the incessant shouting.

--Spell check all signs. (Refer to example above.)

--Leave the grizzly bear costume at home. Same thing goes for Uncle Sam and Nazis. You'll have a chance to wear them on Sunday.

--Don't stomp on a woman's head -- or any head for that matter. It will distract people from your real message and make them think you are crazy (which is the opposite of sane, which is the whole point of this rally).

--If you can't think of your own pithy slogan, don't steal from radical groups that represent the opposite of your ideology. "Keep Your Laws Off My Body" does not apply to multiple situations.

--If you still can't think of a slogan, resist the temptation to resort to racist catchphrases no matter how witty it may sound to you.

--Read a biography of Hitler; learn when and where it is appropriate to make comparisons between him and living Americans (never).

--Don't under any circumstance be a douche.

Are you looking forward to the Rally to Restore Sanity?

Image via Remixer96/Flickr

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